Looking Ahead To 2011…Sort Of…

Chris Fitzpatrick

a humorous look at potential 2011 headlines

Slammies schmammies.  I prefer to take the Mark McGuire route.  "I’m not interested in the past, I’m looking ahead to the future."

Here, for your reading pleasure, are some pro wrestling headlines I’d like to see or expect to see in 2011:

"John Cena to have surgery, out for 11 months, promptly named 2011 ‘Superstar of the Year."

"Vince McMahon vs. Dana White at UFC 126 ends in bedlam, Vince distracted by ‘not knowing who was supposed to win."

"Sheamus suffers sun poisoning on WWE tour of Antarctica."

"Eric Bischoff announces 7-year contract signed with Buddy Rogers despite having been dead since 1992; says ‘his experience will help us set the stage for the unexpected.’"

"To commemorate his ‘campaign against stupidity,’ Edge announces live sex celebration with hand Mae Young gave birth to."

"RAW GM revealed to be David Arquette, Dixie Carter counters by hiring Courtney Cox.  Millions of fans switch to TNA."

"Former XFL player ‘He Hate Me’ inducted into WWE Hall of Fame."

"Brett Favre announces unretirement at Wrestlemania, kicked in the face by Shawn Michaels."

"NXT season 17 ends with .02 cable rating, narrowly edging out TNA Impact."

"Jeff Hardy rushed to hospital after lethal dose of Children’s Tylenol."

"Randy Orton re-hires Ken Kennedy just to have more places to put tatoos."

"Citing untapped potential, Vince McMahon resigns Mark Henry to 12-year deal."

"Mark Henry tears quad, out for 11 years and 11 months."

 

Well that was fun.  For those of you really looking to revisit some of the major events of 2010, Wrestlezone Forums in currently in the midst of our annual year-end awards.  Such awards as "Wrestler of the Year," "PPV of the Year," "Promo of the Year," "Surprise of the Year," and "Worst Wrestler of the Year" are being discussed and voted on as we speak, and can be accessed at this link:  http://forums.wrestlezone.com/forumdisplay.php?f=329.

For those of you needing a break from wrestling, our non-wrestling section is currently featuring the 2nd bi-annual Music Tournament, with 576 musicians divided up into 5 ‘regions’ (singer, guitarist, bassist, drummer, miscellaneous) with the first ever "Wrestlezone Forums Super Band" to be announced at the end.  Feel free to check that out here:  http://forums.wrestlezone.com/forumdisplay.php?f=321

In the meantime, enjoy the last few weeks of December – good luck shoveling out of the snow!

Until next time.

Chris "IrishCanadian25" Fitzpatrick

Wrestlezone Forums Moderator

Have a news tip? Attended an event and want to send a live report? Submit it now!