Vuvuzelas, A**holes and What?

Kevin Kelly

Remember when Chyna first got her breasts enlarged? Long before she was a reality show trainwreck, Chyna (with Hunter pushing for it) wanted to do a photo shoot (black and white, jungle setting). The pictorial of the freshly implanted star ran in Raw Magazine. A few weeks later, Vince Russo told me that Vince McMahon hated the pictures… Russo said it was Hunter and Chyna’s idea, thinking it would lessen the heat. Vinny Mac gave Russo classic advice that I’ll never forget.  

Protect the talent from themselves. 

Just because it sounds good, the creative leader has to think about the big picture and how that idea will impact the overall presentation of the wrestler and the show. We’ll call it the “What?” Theory. Nobody realized that Steve Austin’s “What?” chant would take off and become audio graffiti, but it made money. It was marketable. It was worth the sacrifice to the show’s audio to stain every promo with “What?”, whether it involved Austin or not because of the history that Steve had of getting things over. Give Austin the ball and you will get a touchdown every play.  

Steve Austin was very good at getting fans to play “repeat after me”. Goldmine! Ken Anderson is trying the same thing with a couple of unfortunate differences. Ken Anderson is not Austin, has no track record of success or consistency and is not over. I like Ken but facts are facts.  

I wonder if Anderson (and TNA) believes that getting the fans to say “a**hole” makes him cool and funny. You remember what made Austin cool, right? Steve was a believable, anti-authority, beer-swilling, tough SOB. He fought everyone, trusted no one and didn’t give a damn what the fans thought. After he got the serious character over, then Austin could flip to funny. When the heels got the best of Steve, he would get serious again. If Anderson is really a main-eventer in TNA, they should present him as serious, run for the belt and see if he gets over that way. 

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