Dumb and Dumber – Reaction to Tonight’s WWE Raw Broadcast

Nick Paglino

WWE RawIf you don’t see WWE as idiotic, you’re idiots. Sorry.

Wrestling 101 was filleted, deep fried and served with tater tots when THE HEELS WRESTLED A MATCH AS 11-ON-3 UNDERDOGS. Heels are not supposed to be 11-on-3 underdogs. Heels are not supposed to battle insurmountable odds.

Daniel Bryan, WWE’s top babyface, organized and took part in a 4-on-1 beating.  The Shield’s Seth Rollins sold and battled like a ‘face. Too bad he's in the top heel faction.

But who cares? The IWC likes it. House show attendance is down, PPV buyrates are down, TV ratings are stagnant, but YOU LIKE IT. PLUG THAT APP!

The downturn in business will ultimate be blamed on B-plus wrestler Bryan. If you don’t see that coming, you need a guide dog or a corneal transplant.

Bryan’s promos are getting weaker. Thank God for the YES! trigger.

On this week’s Raw, Bryan sidestepped, mangled and avoided what should be the storyline’s main point at its current juncture: BRYAN IS THE REAL WWE CHAMPION. HE BEAT RANDY ORTON AT NIGHT OF CHAMPIONS, AND BEFORE THAT, TOO. CROOKED REF? TRIPLE H, YOU’RE A LIAR.

But, instead, the past is the past, what’s done is done, I don’t care, let’s get ‘em next time. This way the heels don’t look so much like, well, heels. They’re cool tough guys taking advantage of power. Who wouldn’t? I would. And y’know, that little guy does look like a goat, and what’s he doing with a mega-babe? The Orton/Bellas skit sent a subliminal message: Hot divas should bang legit stars.

It’s awful. It’s just awful booking, no micromanagement, and a disservice to Bryan, who is red-hot (albeit with a dwindling audience). Being red-hot doesn’t matter if the audience is dwindling. That, too, is Wrestling 101.

Bryan should be roasting Orton every chance he gets. I BEAT YOU. I BEAT YOU. I BEAT YOU. YOU’RE A FAKE CHAMPION. I’M THE REAL CHAMPION. Bryan should say that constantly. Orton and Triple H should sell it every time. Orton and Triple H should be enraged. Why? Because it’s true. A babyface’s best friend and a heel’s worst enemy is always the truth.

Not Ron Killings. God, no.

Yeah, I know. You disagree. You love this. Too bad. Like I said, the audience is dwindling. You need to be told you’re wrong. Consider it a public service.

Hey, how come everybody just lets The Big Show knock them out?

Follow Mark on Twitter: @MarkMaddenX

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