Review: WWE TLC 2013 Pay-Per-View

Mike Killam

Match Results

During the PPV pre-show, the Miz trash talked his rival Kofi Kingston until Kingston had enough, charging the commentary booth and attacking Miz. The two were separated by Booker T and Mick Foley, and it looks like we'll have a singles match between the two later on tonight. 

Pre-Show Match
Fandango def. Dolph Ziggler || 3/4*

Fandango dumps Ziggler to the outside immediately so they can cut to a brief commercial break. Fandango is in control after the break – Ziggler hits a Fameasser, but can't get back into it. They fight up to the top turnbuckle, and Summer Rae causes a distraction, knocking down Dolph. Fandango hits a top rope leg drop and picks up a quick 1-2-3. 

3-on-1 Handicap Match
CM Punk def. The Shield || ***1/2

Punk starts things off against Dean Ambrose, but out-wrestles him and tells Shield to tag in somebody he hasn't already beat. In comes Rollins, but Punk ducks under a clothesline and knocks Ambrose off the ring apron, before going to work on his opponent in the ring, with shoulder thrusts into the corner. Punk with a few neckbreakers, but big Roman Reigns is next to tag in for him team, and he easily over-powers Punk. The numbers game sets in for several minutes, with Shield members easily tagging in and out, picking their spots. Punk slaps the taste out of Reigns, firing back with a few hard elbows, but Roman turns him inside-out with a clothesline and the action spills to the floor. He signals for the spear, but Punk dodges at the last minute and Reigns goes flying over the announce table! Reigns has an injured eye from crashing into a chair, and Punk goes right to work on it as they roll back into the ring. In comes Seth Rollins who Punk has an easier time against. He tries for the GTS, but Ambrose provides a distraction and Rollins lands a kick to the head for a two-count. Punk throws Rollins into Ambrose, knocking him from the apron and almost gets three off a side kick. A running knee connects in the corner followed by a cross-body and the Anaconda Vice; Ambrose breaks up the submission. Dean makes a tag, and it's more or less down to a 1-on-1 situation. Punk hits the Randy Savage elbow drop from the top turnbuckle and calls for the finish. Rollins hits the ring and eats a GTS for his trouble. In comes Roman Reigns with a head full of steam, but Punk dodges and Reigns accidentally spears Dean Ambrose. Punk covers the fallen man and picks up the victory. 

Punk bails from the ring to avoid a beating, and taunts The Shield from the entrance ramp. 

Backstage, AJ Lee and Tamina are interviewed by Renee Young. AJ calls the Divas division a joke, and asks what she has to do to win a Slammy award for Diva of the Year. She says nobody has her number, including Natalya, because her number is one; as in, she's the only "one" that matters. 

WWE Divas Championship Match
AJ Lee (c) def. Natalya || **1/2

Natalya out-wrestles the champion to kick off the match, winning a lock-up and applying a side armbar. They fight to the outside and Natalya throws AJ off the barricade, but Tamina draws the challenger's attention and gives Lee time to kick her off the apron. AJ with a kick to the chest for a two-count. Natalya applies a bear hug, but AJ rolls through, only to caught with a seated dropkick. Natalya with a bodyslam before applying the Sharpshooter. AJ almost gets to the ropes, but settles for a reversal instead. The champ locks in the Black Widow, but Natalya reverses and knocks her out with a clothesline. She tries for the Sharpshooter again, but AJ rolls her up with a handful of hair for the 1-2-3. 

Intercontinental Championship Match
Big E. Langston (c) def. Damien Sandow || ***

Both guys try for their finishers early, but Langston ends up splashing his opponent in the corner instead. A big back body drop connects on Sandow, and the champion remains in control until they fight to the outside. Sandow throws Langston off a ring post and pounds away with right hands and fist drops. A clothesline takes down Langston, and the challenger follows up with the Elbow of Disdain. A side headlock is locked in, but Langston powers out of it into the corner, followed by a shoulder thrust, but Sandow counters with a dropkick to the face. He jumps on the big man's back and tries for a sleeper hold, but Big E hits him with an Electric Chair Drop. The champ with a huge belly-to-belly, and he looks to put away Sandow with the Big Ending, but Damien reverses out of it with a sit-down slam. Sandow with a roll-up, but Big E kicks out and levels him with a running lariat. Langston pulls down the straps, hits the Big Ending, and picks up the win. 

Backstage, Vince McMahon has a few words with WWE Champion Randy Orton, as he's preparing for tonight's main event, but we can't hear what they are saying. 

WWE Tag Team Championship Match
Goldust & Cody Rhodes (c) def. Big Show & Rey Mysterio, Ryback & Curtis Axel, The Real Americans || ***3/4

Cody Rhodes starts out kicking the legs out from under Ryback. Curtis Axel comes in for his team, but Goldust takes him down and tags in Big Show. After a few massive chops from Show, Rey Mysterio tags in and Axel is having a very bad day. Ryback gets the tag in for his team and easily picks apart Rey. Goldust intentionally tags in for Mysterio and hits the big man with a huge spinebuster. Goldust with a roll-up and he gets the pin! Curtis Axel & Ryback have been eliminated. The Real Americans immediately attack Goldust from behind, and Ryback gets a measure of revenge with a massive Meathook Clothesline. Cesaro and Swagger alternate tags to pick apart one half of the champions, and the crowd is chanting "We the People" along with them. There are still three very fresh people in this match, as Cody Rhodes, Big Show and Rey Mysterio wait on the outside. Swagger locks in a bear huge on Goldust as Big Show gets the fans behind the babyface champ. Goldy with a roll-up, followed by a slap to the face and a sringboard back elbow. Cesaro stops him from making a tag though, and engages the Cesaro Swing. The Real Americans with a great slingshot-suplex double team move for a two-count, as Cody breaks things up. Swagger attacks Cody on the apron to stop a tag being made, and now Big Show has seen enough, sending him over the barricade. Goldust with a surprising hurricanrana off the second rope on Cesaro, followed by a power slam. A tag is finally made to the completely fresh Big Show, who bullies Cesaro with throws, chops and splashes in the corner. Show signals for the chokeslam, but settles for a KO Punch on Swagger instead. Cesaro comes off the top rope, but gets caught with the KO Punch as well. The Real Americans have been eliminated. The champs come to and realize what they are up against now. Goldust locks up with Big Show and actually pulls off a side headlock, before taking the giant off his feet with a crossbody from the top rope. Big Show tries for a chokeslam, but Goldust counters with a DDT for a two-count. Cody Rhodes gets the tag and the champions hit a monstrous double suplex on the 500-pound Big Show. Rhodes tries for a Disaster Kick, but Show swats him out of the air with a chop. In comes Rey Mysterio with a tilt-the-whirl take-down and seated senton. Rey rolls through a sunset flip and nails a kick to the side of the head. Rhodes out of nowhere with the Disaster Kick, but he only gets two. Mysterio sets up the champs and hits the 619 on Goldust, but Cody – the legal man – rolled under the ropes to escape. Rhodes jumps on Big Show off the apron, accidentally taking out his brother in the process, before sending the big man into the post. Cody comes off the ropes but Rey catches him. He tries for the 619 but Cody catches him, scooping him up for an Alabama Slam; Rey counters and a quick roll-up for a very close count. Cody with the Cross Rhodes, and the champions retain. 

R-Truth def. Brodus Clay || *

Truth is in control early on in the match, brawling with the big man on the outside. The roll back inside and Truth heads up to the top rope, but Clay crotches him in the ropes and hits a Banzai Drop for a count of two. Clay mocks Truth yelling "what's up?" as he bullies him around the ring with splashes, leg drops and suplexes. Brodus seems to be enjoying himself and the crowd is turning on him. Truth takes several splashes in the corner and rolls to the floor, but Brodus follows. Tensai tells him to get back in the ring, and the two partners exchange some heated words. Clay hangs his opponent in the tree of woe, splashing him several times. Tensai gets on the apron and tells him to stop playing around and pick up the win. Brodus yells out that he's better than Tons of Funk; Tensai and the Funkadactyls leave him standing in the middle of the ring, and he turns around into a kick from R-Truth. Truth with a roll-up for the win.

Xavier Woods pulls Truth to safety after the match, and the two celebrate their victory on the entrance ramp, as Brodus Clay freaks out in the middle of the ring. 

Vince McMahon shakes John Cena's hand backstage, and wishes him good luck in tonight's match. 

No Disqualification Match
Kofi Kingston def. The Miz || **

Kofi kicks Miz in the face and the two brawl around the ring, exchanging right hands. They fight to the floor and Kofi hits a clothesline and continues kicking away on his opponent. Kingston dives through the ropes, but Miz clocks him in the jaw. Miz takes control for several moments, targeting Kofi's knee. There's definitely some heel antics from Miz, as he slaps his opponent in the face and continues to attack the knee. Again they fight to the floor and Miz dumps Kingston onto the barricade, before taking the pads off one of the top turnbuckles. A running knee connects and Miz pretends he's a plane, setting up for the Scull Crushing Finale. He hooks the move and teases doing it into the exposed turnbuckle, but Kofi counters out. Miz comes off the top rope, but Kofi with a dropkick to the face. Kingston tries for the SOS, but ends up sending Miz into the exposed turnbuckle. Trouble in Paradise connects for the 1-2-3. 

3-on-1 Handicap Match
The Wyatt Family def. Daniel Bryan || ***

Bray Wyatt remains seated in his rocking chair as Daniel Bryan goes to work on Erick Rowan. In comes Luke Harper, who gets caught with an abdominal stretch. Harper slaps Bryan across the face and tags in Rowan, as the double team becomes a bit too much for Bryan to handle. Daniel tries to build some momentum with help from the fans, but Harper catches him with a huge sit-down slam. Bray Wyatt finally gets involved, screaming at Bryan that "it didn't have to be like this." Wyatt levels Bryan and does the creepy spider walk across the ring, tagging in Harper. The 3-on-1 beat-down continues until Bray gives him a break, extending his hand and telling him to "make all of this go away". Bryan kicks him and tries to mount a comeback, but the Wyatts are just too much. Harper with a sit-down powerbomb for a two-count. Daniel Bryan works up a head of steam and lands a dropkick in the corner before knocking the Wyatts off the apron. He fights up to the top rope and dumps Harper on his back with a huge suplex. Bryan sets in with kicks to the chest as the crowd chants "YES!", following that up with the Flying Goat; Rowan breaks up the pin. Bryan catches Rowan with a kick to the head, and he falls back and gets caught up in the ropes. The ring is cleared of the Wyatt Family, and Bryan almost catches Bray with a roll-up. Daniel goes suicide dive to the outside, knocking Harper clear over the announce table. Missile dropkick takes out Wyatt and he tries for the Yes Lock, but Bray counters out and hits Sister Abigail for the win. 

TLC Match for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship
John Cena vs. Randy Orton || ****1/4

Cena goes to the outside early on and starts throwing chairs, only to get blasted from behind by Randy Orton, who grabs a ladder and brings it into the ring. Cena follows with a table, perching it in the corner. A chair gets involved now, as Orton slams it off the back of the world champion. The Viper stalks John to the outside and continues hammering away with the chair, mocking the fans with his "you can't see me gesture". A swing and a miss for the WWE Champion, as he hits the post with a chair and allows Cena to go on the attack. Cena tries to powerbomb Randy through a table, but ends up getting thrown head-first into steel ring steps. They roll back into the ring and the Viper is in total control, hitting Cena with a knee to the head and a series of right hands. Cena throws a few elbows and knees, but gets caught with a powerslam. Orton remains in control for several minutes, keeping ladders out of the ring so he can continues to beat up his opponent. Cena with a shoulder tackle, shoulder tackle, spin-out slam combo, but Orton recovers and sends him into a chair trapped in the corner. Randy goes to get a ladder and start his climb, but John gets up and knocks him off the apron, through a table set up on the outside. Cena begins to climb, but Orton gets back up at the last minute, knocks over the ladder and hits an RKO. Climbing a ladder is now out of the picture, as the two brawl to the outside and start throwing each other off whatever they can find. Cena destroys Orton with two shots from the steel steps, taking some time to set up another table in the ring. Randy with a shot from a microphone that dazes the world champ, and he continues with mounted punches, letting the mic echo around the arena. The Spanish announce table gets stripped down before Orton tries for a punt kick; Cena blocks it, hoists up Randy and puts him through the table with an Attitude Adjustment. After a moment to rest, John Cena brings a ladder into the ring and starts his slow climb. He gets his hands on the titles, but Randy Orton is back in the ring attacking him with a chair. The ladder falls and Cena is still hanging on to the titles, but he finally has to let go as Orton continues his assault. Out of desperation, Cena crashes them both through one of the tables set up in the ring, both men taking serious damage. Randy Orton recovers first, and for some reason he starts ripping apart the pads on the floor. Orton takes a pair of handcuffs that he obviously placed under the mats, and secures his opponent to the bottom rope. Orton takes the keys and throws them into the crowd, so Cena starts trying to break the cuffs with a ladder, then a chair, then he starts trying to take apart the ring. Cena actually takes the entire rope off the ring and climbs the ladder – the ring still attached to him – and knocks Orton to the ground. Orton pulls the ropes, dragging Cena from the ladder and through the other table in the ring. Randy Orton climbs the ladder, slowly, and removes both championships, winning the match. 

After Randy Orton celebrates with for several minutes, Vince McMahon's music hits and the boss comes down to the ring along with Triple H and Stephanie McMahon. The Authority celebrates with their champion as TLC goes off the air. 

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