You know, I’ve been doing these takes for the past three and a half months, and it’s been full of memories. Some great shows, some not so great shows. Some predictions made which were way off, and some indy wrestlers chewing me out for not knowing the name of other indy wrestlers who would grow to become WWE stars. I’ve very much enjoyed it. Thanks to each and every one of you for reading, writing, and following along with me.
Tonight’s episode began with an eight man tag match which, of course, left me to wonder: what the heck would be on the rest of the show?
CM Punk teamed up with Shannon Moore, Jimmy Wang Yang, and the undefeated Kofi Kingston to take on Elijah Burke, Shelton Benjamin, and Deuce and Domino. It was a very fun match to watch, and it was a highlight for me to see Burke and Benjamin tie up with some wrestlers they haven’t had much of a chance to face previously.
Also, I finally figured out that it was Deuce who yells “DEUCE AND DOMINO!!!!” during the team’s matches. My friend and I had been operating under the theory that it was some rabid and highly devoted Deuce and Domino fan who followed the team from town to town.
The faces won the match after Kofi Kingston’s buzzsaw enzeguri thingie. This match brought back a lot of memories of my time as the ECW reviewer here at WZ.com. Like, remember that time when I said that Kofi Kingston would be the first WWE superstar in space? No? Well, I’m saying it now. Kofi Kingston will be the first WWE superstar in space.
Stating that tonight’s ECW began with an eight man tag was technically inaccurate. What the show really began with was the passing of the announcer’s headset from ECW legend Joey Styles to WWE newbie, Mike Adamle. Even after all these years, some of WWE’s decisions still manage to just totally blow my mind. Joey Styles, THE voice of ECW and a colorful personality who can pull people into a broadcast, pulled off to work on WWE.com? Sure, Joey has the experience – he used to head up 1wrestling.com. Still, what the hell?
For his part, Adamle sounds like a good, credible sports announcer. I’m just very surprised at this decision, and yes, plenty disappointed. No offense to Adamle, of course, but the Styles – Taz announce team was one of my favorite things about the ECW brand.
There was a Diva dance-off. Five Divas competed and, despite the fact the Layla danced 500 meter crop circles around Kelly Kelly, Kelly Squared was chosen by the fans as the winner. Afterwards, she and Taz danced the Lambada, or “Forbidden Dance.” Actually, there was nothing forbidden about it. Taz wiggled around while Kelly danced beside him.
Mike Knox was set to face Tommy Dreamer, who was replaced by Colin Delaney at the behest of Armando Estrada. Knox won in a squash, pinning Colin after his spinning Downward Spiral-type maneuver.
The night’s main event saw The Undertaker and Kane taking on The Miz and John Morrison in a “Match of Champions.” Translation? The “Bimonthly Burial of the Tag Team Division.” Taker and Kane won after a pair of chokeslams and a tombstone piledriver.
Now it’s time, once again, for the weekly rating. And this week’s ECW on Sci-Fi gets a perfect 10 / 10. Not because it deserves it, but because I wanted to give a great episode a rating of 10 before I stopped, and tonight’s the last review!
I’ve enjoyed doing these reviews. Be sure to stay tuned to the site for my column, Offbeat Shenanigans. Keep watching ECW on Sci-Fi. Sure, it’s not the original Heyman-created product, but that’s beside the point. ECW, as a brand, offers more wrestling per hour than any other mainstream weekly wrestling program.
Well…that’s my mama! *Peter Griffin laugh*
Kevin McElvaney is also a contributing writer for Pro Wrestling Illustrated and The Wrestler / Inside Wrestling.