Jacksonville House Show Results, Rumble Qualifier & More

Keelan Balderson


Special thanks to Bree V. For these notes:

Here’s the details from the Raw Jacksonville house show last night:

-William Regal came out, got some cheap heat by forgetting the town name, and was challenged by Cody Rhodes for a Royal Rumble qualifying match. Rhodes won.

-In an unexpected moment, Ted Dibiasi Jr. had a match with Charlie Haas, who kept whipping out some luchadore mask and acting like an assclown. I’m assuming they were testing out the gimmick, and now they know: the audience hated him.

-D.H. Smith had a match, although I spent most of this out of the arena so I couldn’t tell you who with.

-Drew McIntyre vs. Trevor Murdoch, Murdoch again got some cheap heat by dissing the town (which was smart cuz most everyone seemed confused as hell for who to root for)

-In ANOTHER sons-of-legends turn, Afa Jr. (spelling that wrong, I’m almost certain, and I really didn’t catch if he was going under that name or not) had a match in which he lost to Super Crazy.

-Atlas DuBone and some other guy (such investigative journalism skills) went up against The Highlanders and won. DuBone was actually pretty damn titilating to watch, and I got the distinct impression that the guy is gonna be a star if he keeps his ego in check. Ashley accompanied, and sadly, got the biggest pop out of all of the above matches.

HOWEVER, things changed when:

-Santino Marella came out and issued a challenge to the locker room, saying he was the toughest man there in an effort to impress Maria (who was not present, and thank god for small favors). Of course, Hardcore Holly took the invitation, to which Santino explained, “Uh, I wasn’t talking to you”. Santino fared well in the match, all in all, but Holly had the crowd support and eventually (of course) ended things with the Alabama slam. He had a brief confrontation with some guy in the front row, but went on his way, and acted unusually face-ish as he went through and touched hands with the crowd all over the arena.

-Mickie James vs. Beth Phoenix for the women’s title was significantly better than your average diva match because A/ both Beth and Mickie can wrestle and B/ no one was smacking anyone with pillows. Mickie lost (of course) but got a huge pop both before and after the match.

-Randy Orton vs. Jeff Hardy was amazing. Those two never acted once like there weren’t any cameras, they still gave it their all despite the house show status. Clearly, Orton retained (and by fair means, oddly enough) but of course Jeff got the whole arena on its feet.

-DX and Umaga/Snitsky was a sight to behold. DX, as per usual, whipped a crowd that had been pretty split on everything until Hardy v. Orton into a total frenzy, and they were funny to boot. When Triple H began the “For the thousands in attendance, and the millions watching at home…”, Shawn Micheals leaned over and whispered something to him, and he self corrected: “For the millions NOT watching at home”… He also said he had nothing witty to say as his opponents were merely a fat Samoan and a guy with nasty teeth. DX did get their asses handed to them multiple times in the match and had to rock/paper/scissors each other for who went in against Snitsky, and when Michaels tagged Triple H in, he rolled out and grabbed the mic and asked for a toothbrush or something for his opponent. A fan handed HBK some gum, which he offered to Snitsky but got smacked out of his hand. In the end, DX prevailed, and both members spent considerable time crossing back and forth to high-five some fans. Basically everyone on the sidelines got some love from both of them.

Interesting notes:

-Tony Chimel announced

-There was a huge “BRUSH YOUR TEETH” chant for Snitsky, probably the most prevalent chant of the night aside from “HARDY! HARDY!”

-There was a sign that said “JBL, SMACKDOWN IS CONSTIPATED, THEY NEED THEIR ASSHOLE BACK”

-Some drunk guy a row or two beside me kept standing up and yelling for John during the Hardy v. Orton match. No lie. John. Somebody misses Cena a little too much.

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