Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler are at ringside as usual.
Mr. Kennedy kicks off the show in the ring. This Sunday we have the opportunity to make history because we all get to vote for the man who’ll face Randy Orton for the WWE Championship. Let’s look at the candidates. Okey dokey. On one hand, you have Intercontinental Champion Jeff Hardy, who’s like Hilary Clinton, blonde hair, famous last name, but he won’t get the job done because, like Hilary, he has no balls. Touche. Then you have Shawn Michaels who talks tough and has an impressive resume, but he lives in the past. Kennedy asks what Shawn has done lately but whatever it is, it’s not as impressive as what Kennedy has done â<80>” he’s been US Champion and Money in the Bank winner. He has wins over Mysterio, Batista and The Undertaker. Ask not what Mr. Kennedy can do for you, but what the fans can do for Mr. Kennedy. Make no mistake, if elected, he will defeat Randy Orton to become WWE Champion, Mr. Kennedy!
Yo! Jeff Hardy is out in the crowd.
Hardy says by standing out here in the fans, he can tell Kennedy sucks. Kennedy says Hardy doesn’t want to get into a debate with him. Kennedy says Jeff is out there begging for votes. Hardy cuts Kennedy off. He tried to pass himself off as as a McMahon and failed. Hardy says Kennedy will fail at persuading the fans. Kennedy doesn’t have to listen to this. Hardy says there’s one vote Kennedy will win. Who wants to see Hardy go in there and beat the hell out of Kennedy?
Hardy attacks and they brawl. Orton is out here now and the numbers catch up with Hardy. Kennedy and Orton beat down the IC champion until Shawn Michaels makes the save and takes out Orton. HBK chases Orton to the back. Kennedy and Hardy slug it out in the ring and Hardy tosses Kennedy to the floor. Jeff Hardy stands tall.
Paul London, Brian Kendrick and Mickie James vs. Lance Cade, Trevor Murdoch and Melina
Mickie looksâ<80>¦ good. Real good.
Cade and London kicks us off with a go behind by London into a side headlock. Side headlock takeover by London but he runs into a shoulder block and goes down. Cade beats down London in the corner with clubbing blows but gets caught with a springboard crossbody. Arm drag by London. Tag to Kendrick who sunset flips over the top for 2. Arm drag by Kendrick. Tag to London who comes off onto the arm of Cade. Tag to Kendrick who does the same. Mickie tagged in now but Cade avoids her offense and Melina is in with forearms to James. Hair mare by Mickie, I think, kick to the gut, now the face and Melina tags out. Kendrick and Murdoch in and they slug it out. Cade in and takes Kendrick down. Elbow drop to Kendrick, tag to Murdoch. Assisted leg drop gets a 2 count for Murdoch. Kendrick tries to fight back but gets stopped. Cade in and boots Kendrick, keeping him down. Telegraph by Kendrick and an enziguri. Hot tag to London takes down Murdoch, and again. Dropkick to Murdoch. Leapfrog, leg lariat by London gets 2, but it’s broken up by Cade. Mickie in to intercept Melina. She tosses Melina. Cade inadvertently takes out his partner and Kendrick takes Cade to the floor. London gets the cover on Murdoch and that’s the 3!
Winners â<80>” London, Kendrick, James
We’re down to the final 3 in the Diva Search. The chicks took the role of a police officer this week to order Todd Grisham around. The chicks are backstage. Eve, Brooke and Lena are the final 3.
Velvet Revolver’s “Let It Roll” is the theme song for the Diva Search.
Shawn Michaels chats with Jeff Hardy backstage. Orton tried to end his career, and tonight he is going for a third Sweet Chin Music and will win the title Sunday. Jeff says that’s unless the fans vote for someone else. Shawn asks if Jeff’ll turn on him. Jeff says he’s only going to do what Shawn would do.
Cody Rhodes is reading WWE Magazine. World’s Greatest Tag Teams interrupt and mock Rhodes for jobbing to Hardcore Holly. Benjamin vs. Rhodes tonight. Rhodes says Benjamin looks like a “tool” and he doesn’t respect him. Benjamin says he’ll embarrass him in front of the world.
Coach and William Regal talk backstage. Vince is out of the country this week. Coach wants to face Hornswoggle tonight. After some persuasion, Regal makes the match. Oh, but Coach thinks Hornswoggle vs. Umaga would be better.
We get highlights of Hardcore Holly beating Cody Rhodes again in the UK last week.
Cody Rhodes vs. Shelton Benjamin
Cody was right â<80>” Shelton does look like a tool. Not as big a tool as Haas, but still a tool.
Kick by Shelton, rights and kicks in the corner, single leg, kick to the thighs by Shelton. Spinning leg drop to the leg of Rhodes. Kicks to Rhodes’ knee now. Benjamin jumps on the leg of Rhodes using the ropes. Cody fights back. Knee breaker by Shelton though. Rhodes gets telegraphed but then buries a knee in the sternum of Benjamin. Bulldog out of the corner gets 2 for Rhodes. Haas trips Rhodes allowing Benjamin to get a roll-up, but Cody rolls through it and pins Benjamin!
Winner â<80>” Cody Rhodes
Haas attacks from behind and they beat down Rhodes. Hardcore Holly is here and the World’s Greatest Tag Team bail. Holly stands tall and helps Cody up. Haas and Benjamin call it a day and Holly and Rhodes stand tall.
Hardcore gives Cody the nod.
Harry Smith is here! He’s the son of Davey Boy Smith and he’s dedicating his first match on Raw to his father! JR informs us his name is in fact D.H. Smith.
D.H. Smith vs. Carlito
Arm wringer by Carlito, Smith counters into one of his own but gets booted. Slides underneath, jack-knife roll-up by Smith gets 2. Shoulder knock down by Smith. Overhead throw gets 2 for Smith. Springboard dropkick connects from Carlito and he covers for 2. Into the corner and Carlito with a hard chop. Scoop slam by Carlito gets 2. Bow and arrow applied by Carlito. Smith powers out and fires of, gets telegraphed and then clotheslined by Carlito who is a veteran apparently. Side headlock applied by Carlito, but Smith backs him into the corner and nails a couple of European uppercuts. A pair of dropkicks connect. Northern lights suplex gets 2, but Carlito comes back with a springboard reverse elbow for 2. Smith catches Carlito on his shoulder and hits a powerslam for 3!
Winner â<80>” D.H. Smith
Candice and Phoenix square of backstage. Phoenix tells Candice she’ll get on her knees tonight and worship the Glamazon. Candice says no one can make her get down on her knees. I beg to differ!
Lucky for us, we get a long video package of Coach and Hornswoggle’s “antics” last week.
Sign of the Night â<80>” “Umaga needs a HUG~!”
Umaga with Coach vs. Hornswoggle
Hornswoggle comes from under the ring. Coach screams at Horny to get in the ring. Horny hops down off the steps and runs up the ramp. Coach gives chase but pauses.
TIME TO PLAY THE GAME~!
Business just picked up! Triple H makes his way to the ring. Umaga is ready. Triple H gets in the ring. BRAWL! They slug it out. Triple H gets the upper hand but Umaga lands an upper cut. Air Game! Mounted rights by Triple H as referees swarm out to pull him off. Umaga breaks free and attacks. Referees separate them but Trips breaks free and knocks Umaga to the floor. He drags Triple H out now and they go at it. Umaga knocks The Game down. Triple H grabs a chair but gets jabbed in the throat. Umaga tosses The Game over the announce table. Triple H leaps off the table and takes out Umaga and about 5 referees. They’re still going at it. Triple H leaps off the steps this time and takes Umaga down. Trips runs the distance of the ramp to get to Umaga. They tear at each other. Dozens of referees are holding them back now and the crowd wants to see them go. Triple H escapes and nails Umaga again.
Tomorrow night on ECW â<80>” Kane vs. Big Daddy V
We see replays of what just happened.
Backstage, Umaga is flipping tables like nobodies business.
T-Grish is here! We’ve been voting on the Diva Search for weeks, apparently. You wanna bet? T-Grish brings out Brooke, Eve and Lena. Brooke FTW. One of them is going home tonight. The results are in. The Diva finalist going home isâ<80>¦
Lena’s gone. Next week on Raw, we crown a winner. But now they each get 30 seconds to persuade us to vote.
Brooke wants to be part of the family. Basically, she shatters all kinds of records for cock-sucking in 30 seconds.
Eve says the WWE fans are the best in the world. Yeah, more of the same.
Randy Orton and Mr. Kennedy face off backstage. Orton says the only reason he came out earlier is to beat Hardy down. But at Sunday, there’s no way Kennedy will face Orton on Sunday, because nobody likes him. OH, SNAP~! Kennedy says he wants to make a statement tonight. Orton says he does not want to make an enemy out of him.
Kasabian’s “Fast Fuse” is the theme for Cyber Sunday and it is available now.
Santino has the WWE Magazine “500” edition. Everyone is in there. Austin is in there 200 odd times, but Santino Marella isn’t mentioned. Santino is interrupted by Save.Us! “Y2J! Y2J! Y2J!” Marella says Austin is a coward and if he comes back he’ll open a can of whoop-ass.
Santino Marella with My Maria vs. Ron Simmons
Santino goes to the thighs but gets forced into the corner. Switch and no clean break. Right by Simmons, and a couple more. Back elbow sends Marella down. Santino with a single-leg and mounted punches. He goes for a pin and gets 2. Chin lock applied now. The crowd gets behind Simmons who works his way to his feet and elbows his way out of the hold. Clothesline in the corner now by Simmons. Santino comes back with a blatant low blow for the DQ.
Winner â<80>” Ron Simmons by DQ
Santino says it was an accident.
T-Grish is in the back with Triple H. Triple H says it doesn’t matter what the stipulation is â<80>” if he had his way he’d have all three. He looked Umaga in the eyes tonight and saw doubt. Sunday, he’ll see fear. He’ll step into the ring with the one true destroyer, the King of Kings. 6 days, Cyber Sunday â<80>” time to play the game.
Candice walks~! She’s next!
“Let me show you what love is!”
Damn, girl, you can show me whatever you want!
Women’s Championship (2 Out of 3 Falls) â<80>” Beth Phoenix vs. Candice Michelle
They lock up and Phoenix takes it to the corner. No clean break as Phoenix elbows Michelle in the corner. Forearms to the face now of Candice. Michelle comes back with a hurricanrana from the top rope, ducks a clothesline and goes for a sunset flip. Phoenix blocks it and hoists Candice up and dumps her for the first fall. 1-0 Phoenix!
We’re back with Phoenix trying to lock in a Boston crab. During the break, Phoenix was dominant, catching Michelle in mid-air a couple of times. Candice comes back with slaps and kicks Phoenix away, but gets booted in the face. Forearms now by Beth, but Candice comes back with shots of her own. A pair of clotheslines and a dropkick connect for Michelle. A third clothesline gets a 2 count. Beth comes back with an elbow but gets caught with a boot. Wheelbarrow roll-up gets 2 for Candice. Heel kick gets 2. Michelle goes to the top rope, but falls FLAT ON HER FACE and she is out. Phoenix makes the cover and gets the win 2-0.
Winner â<80>” Beth Phoenix
That looked ugly. Thankfully she’s sat up and seemingly OK, though medics and officials are out to check on her. It looks like her left shoulder is hurting. They’ve brought a stretcher down now and a slow-mo replay makes it look that much worse. THIS WAS ALL STORYLINE!!
Randy Orton and Mr. Kennedy vs. Shawn Michaels and Jeff Hardy
Kennedy and Michaels lock up and go to the corner â<80>” no clean break by Kennedy as he beats away at Michaels who reverses and lights Kennedy up with a series of chops. Michaels botches a swinging neckbreaker, but gets a snapmare and boot to the face. Hardy in now but gets caught by Kennedy. Takedown by Hardy, to the second rope â<80>” elbow to the back of the head gets just a 1 count. Hardy misses a dive into the corner and Kennedy tags the champion. Orton hammers away at Hardy. JR says there’s no update on Candice Michelle’s condition. Hardy blocks a right and fights back with shots of his own, but he quickly gets put down with a clothesline that gets a 2 count for Orton. Tag TO Kennedy now who gets a 2 count off of Hardy. Kennedy runs into a boot and HBK gets the hot tag. Atomic drop on Kennedy, followed by a scoop slam. Michaels goes to the apron and decks Orton, but Kennedy takes advantage and beats down Michaels. Orton in now with a shot to the gut of Michaels. Orton hammers away at the face of Michaels. HBK comes back with a right hand, a couple of chops, but then he takes a stiff Irish whip. Stomp by Orton. Kennedy in and gets a cover for 2. Kennedy applies a modified abdominal stretch as the fans get behind the Heartbreak Kid. Michaels fights to his feet and punches his way out, but Kennedy scoops him up and nails a back breaker â<80>” and another! It gets a 2 count. Kennedy hoists Michaels up, but HBK rolls out and into a back elbow for 2. Orton tagged in now and he works over Michaels with the Garvin stomp. Michaels fires off but gets beat down by Kennedy who tags in and hammers away at the face of Michaels. Kennedy goes for another cover and gets a near fall. Orton back in and he applies a CHINLOCK~! With body scissors! Michaels fights out and they trade blows centre of the ring. Drop toehold by Orton prevents Shawn from tagging out. ENZIGURI! Michaels crawling to his corner now. Tags both sides and Hardy unloads on Kennedy. Mule kick by Hardy â<80>” rope-assisted dropkick gets a near fall as Orton breaks it up. Michaels tosses Orton and dives over the ropes and takes out Orton. WHISPER IN THE WIND on the inside. Hardy tosses his shirt and heads up. Kennedy crotches him and goes up top. Hardy shoves him down â<80>” SWANTON BOMB! 1â<80>¦ 2â<80>¦ 3!
Winners â<80>” Jeff Hardy and Shawn Michaels
Orton sneaks in behind Jeff. He
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