WWE Survivor Series Opener:
The PPV began with a video package putting over the history of the Survivor Series and highlighting some of the issues leading to matches on tonight’s show. Michael Cole & JBL welcomed us, then tossed it over to Jim Ross & Jerry Lawler, then it went to Hugo Savinovich & Carlos Cabrera. No ECW announce team. Then again, there’s no matches on the show that are strictly ECW.
Survivor Series Elimination Match
Simmons started out with Mikey. Mikey shoved Simmons, then went down when he tried a shoulderblock. They locked up, and Mikey grabbed a side headlock, but Simmons threw him right off and dared him to get up. Mikey poked him in the eyes and hit some forearms, but Simmons powerslammed him, then laid out the rest of the Squad as they ran in.
Mitch tripped Simmons, and when Ron went out after him, Mitch backed up into Arn Anderson, who threw him into the ringpost, then into the ring. The referee claimed he counted out Simmons, even though he never actually reached ten in the ring, as far as I could see. Ron Simmons is eliminated. The referee ordered Mitch to leave as well, claiming he saw the trip. Simmons gave Mitch a spinebuster, then dragged Mitch to the locker room. The referee then ordered Arn Anderson out for throwing Mitch (who was not a match participant) into the ringpost. The fans chanted bullshit. Lawler noted this is the first time a referee has seen and called everything. Slaughter got in with Nicky and after Nicky saluted him, Slaughter gave him a series of bodyslams. Dusty tagged in and hit a bionic elbow to Nicky’s outstretched arm. Rhodes elbowed the arm again, then tagged in Ric Flair, who chopped Nicky in the corner. Flair hit some more chops, then tagged in Slaughter, who hit a clothesline then put Nicky in the Cobra Clutch.
Nicky was going out, when Kenny ran in to break it up. Dusty stopped him, but this distracted the referee, and Johnny superkicked Slaughter, and Nicky got the pin. Sgt. Slaughter is eliminated. Dusty dropped an elbow on the nearly unconscious Nicky and got a pin. Nicky is eliminated. Mikey worked on Dusty, then tagged in Johnny. Dusty threw some elbows, but Johnny managed to keep him in the Spirit Squad corner and tag Kenny. Dusty hit the flip, flop and fly on Kenny, but missed an elbow in the corner. Kenny rolled up Dusty and pulled his jeans for a pin. Dusty Rhodes is eliminated. Johnny screamed about it being 3 on 1 as he went after Flair. He tagged in Mikey, who traded shots with Flair. Flair hit a reverse atomic drop, then used the ropes for leverage for the pin. Mikey is eliminated. Kenny backdropped Flair and hit some elbows to the chest.
Flair grabbed a small package on a backdrop attempt and got the pin. Kenny is eliminated. Kenny and Flair shoved each other, and Johnny shoved Flair from behind, knocking him into Kenny, and knocking Kenny out of the ring. Johnny went for a right hand, but Flair ducked it, hit a shinbuster and applied the figure four leglock for the submission at the ten minute mark.
Survivor – Ric Flair
The other members of the Spirit Squad ran in and turned the figure four over so Flair was trapped in the move. Kenny hit a top rope legdrop to the back of Flair’s head. The Spirit Squad then left, with Flair laid out in the ring.
United States Championship Match
Benoit hit some forearms at the bell and slammed Chavo, then hit a powerdrive elbow and a side backbreaker for a one count. Benoit rammed Chavo in the buckles, then chopped his chest. Benoit delivered some knees to the gut, then headbutted Chavo to the ring apron. Chavo rolled back in and hit an uppercut, but Benoit chopped him down then hit a snap suplex for another one count. Benoit slammed Chavo for another one. Chavo hit a shot to the gut and went on offense with European uppercuts and punches, but Benoit headbutted him and chopped Chavo.
Benoit hit a running forearm for another one count. Benoit hit some kneelifts, then chopped Chavo. Guerrero fired back with some forearms to the back, then stomped Benoit in the corner. Benoit grabbed Chavo’s arm and took him down in a Crippler Crossface attempt, but Vickie grabbed Chavo’s foot and pulled it to the ropes. Benoit hit some knees to the head, then dropped Chavo with a back suplex. Chavo hit a knee to the gut and threw Benoit shoulder first into the ringpost, then choked him with his boot. Chavo delivered a backdrop driver for a two count, then kicked Benoit and applied a rear chinlock before switching to an overhead wristlock. Benoit lifted Chavo and hit a Samoan Drop to escape the hold, but Chavo came right back with a dropkick for a two count.
Chavo kicked at Benoit’s arm, then decked him with an uppercut. Chavo yelled “I told you to stay out of my business, but you don’t want to” as he kicked him. Chavo missed a right hand and Benoit hit three consecutive German suplexes, then called for the top rope headbutt. Benoit went to the ropes, but Vickie grabbed at his foot, slowing him down. Benoit went for the headbutt, but Chavo rolled out of the way. Chavo kicked at Benoit’s back, then delivered a series of forearms. Chavo hit a brainbuster, then went to the top rope. Chavo hit a frog splash for a two count. There was a brief “Eddie” chant.
Chavo went to pick up Benoit, but Benoit grabbed his legs and went for a Sharpshooter, but Chavo started punching Benoit in the head before he could turn it over. Vickie got on the apron, as Chavo kicked off Benoit, and Benoit fell backwards into Vickie on the apron, knocking her to the floor. Chavo rolled up Benoit for a two count, but Benoit rolled through it and got the Crippler Crossface for the tapout win that the eight minute mark.
Winner and still United States Champion, Chavo Guerrero
JBL screamed bloody murder over Benoit knocking down Vickie Guerrero, even though the replays showed he went into her back first.
Backstage, Todd Grisham interviewed Edge and Lita. Lita ripped on the fans and said she hadn’t changed her mind, she was retiring tonight. Edge said Mickie James will go down faster than Donovan McNabb for the cheap heat moment. Lita left, then Edge bragged about winning his Survivor Series match later, while Cryme Tyme snuck into Lita’s dressing room behind Edge’s back. Edge left, and Cryme Tyme walked out with a box with a bra hanging out of it. Grisham asked what they were doing, and they told him he didn’t see anything, before taking off with the box.
Women’s Championship Match
Lita was introduced as “competing in her final match”. Mickie slapped Lita at the bell, then hit a drop toe hold and kicked her. Mickie hit some punches in the corner, then choked Lita on the middle rope. Mickie hit some kicks to the midsection, but Lita came back with a toss into the buckles and a one legged monkey flip. Lita kit some kicks, then threw Mickie in the corner. Mickie fought back with punches, but Lita threw her down by the hair.
Mickie hit a clothesline, then went for a headscissors, but Lita threw it off and rammed Mickie head first to the mat. Lita choked Mickie against the middle rope. The fans keep yelling “Hooo!” and I don’t think they are looking for a Hacksaw run-in. Lita hit some knees to the gut, but Mickie fought back, only to be given a side Russian legsweep. Lita stomped Mickie in the groin, then headbutted her there. There was a “She’s a Crack Whore” chant. Lita suplex Mickie for a two count. Lawler is unloading all of his one-liners, making fun of Lita. Lita applied a sleeper, but Mickie made the ropes. Lita went to the top rope, but Mickie dodged a flying bodypress attempt. Mickie started to climb the ropes, but Lita grabbed her and hit a back suplex. “She’s got herpes” chant now. Lita nipple slip pics at the bottom of this report. They traded punches, with Mickie getting the better of it. Mickie hit a clothesline, and a pair of back elbows, and got a two count. Mickie threw some kicks, finishing with a spin kick for a two count. Mickie grabbed a cradle suplex for a two count. Mickie set up for a DDT, but Lita shoved her off into the corner. Lita charged, and Mickie grabbed her for a headscissors, but Lita threw it off.
Lita hit a moonsault for a two count. Lita went for a DDT, but Mickie grabbed the ropes and Lita fell hard to the mat. Mickie rolled up Lita for a two count. Lita grabbed a small package for a two count. Mickie floated over a slam and rolled up Lita for a two count, then Lita reversed it for a two count. Mickie then grabbed Lita in a swinging DDT for the pin at the nine minute mark.
Winner and new Women’s Champion, Mickie James
James left. Lita demanded that Lilian Garcia come into the ring and say “Let’s here it for the greatest Women’s Champion of all time”. The fans booed. Lita freaked out, saying how disgusted she was with the fans and how disrespectful they were. Cryme Tyme’s music hit, and they came out, carrying the box. Lita was still throwing a tantrum in the ring. Cryme Tyme said they found a box of her stuff, and they were going to have a tribute sale, a “Ho-sale” if you will. They started selling her underwear to fans at ringside, for cash. Lita was freaking out on the mic, while Cryme Tyme kept selling stuff. They found a Monostat box, read the instructions, then sold it for a dollar. JBL even got in on it, saying he was the only man in the company without a pair of her panties, so he bought a pair. JBL asked for change of a hundred, and Cryme Tyme took off with the bill. Cryme Tyme took out something wrapped in a towel that was “vibrating”. Lita offered to buy that back herself, but they sold it to someone in the crowd for $25. They then joked that they had something “cheap and wide”, and held up the empty box, saying “It’s Lita’s box”. Cryme Tyme left while Lita continued her tantrum in the ring.
They showed an interview Michael Cole conducted with Batista earlier today. Cole brought up that they were in the same building that Batista had to surrender the title in. Batista said nothing. Cole noted that Batista had failed in his previous attempts to win the belt. Batista said nothing. Cole mentioned Batista signing the contract that stated he would not get another title shot after tonight. Batista said nothing. They showed Booker laying out Batista with the scepter on Smackdown. Batista had no comment. Cole asked him if he had anything to say. Batista finally spoke, just saying “I’m leaving tonight, World Heavyweight Champion”.
Survivor Series Elimination Match
Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler handled this match. The Hardy Boyz came out first, then CM Punk, then DX had their entrance. They all played up to the crowd as DX went into their mic work. A “CM Punk” chant started, so Triple H had Punk ask the crowd “Are You Ready?” before going into his usual bit. Johnny Nitro & Melina then came out, then Gregory Helms, then Mike Knox & Kelly Kelly (who waved to Punk, who waved back), then Randy Orton & Edge.
Knox started off for his team with Triple H, who tried to get Kelly Kelly to flash him, and Shawn Michaels in the ring. Knox shoved Triple H, and Shawn Michaels superkicked Knox and pinned him. Mike Knox is eliminated at the ten second mark. team DX then discussed what they should do next. Michaels and Nitro began running the ropes, and Michaels slid out of the ring, and stood next to Melina. Melina, thinking it was Nitro (she was facing the crowd) hugged him before realizing who it was.
Michaels got back in the ring and tagged in Jeff Hardy, who tagged in Matt to double team Nitro. Nitro managed to get Hardy into his corner to tag Helms. Helms and Hardy went at it, and Hardy went to the second rope, but Helms sweeped his leg to knock him off. Edge tagged in, mocked Matt, and stomped him. Helms tagged in and suplexed Matt, then Orton tagged in and stomped Hardy, who was bleeding from the mouth. Nitro tagged in and hit a series of punches and forearms on Matt. Matt came back with a Side Effect on Nitro, then tagged in CM Punk, to a big pop. Punk hit Nitro with some kicks and forearms, then delivered some knees, including a jumping knee in the corner. Punk hit a bulldog. Nitro tried to come back, but Matt yanked him throat first across the top rope. Punk applied the Anaconda Vice on Nitro for the tapout. Johnny Nitro is eliminated at the five minute mark.
Edge came in, and he and Punk went at it. Punk got Edge in a corner for some punches, but Orton yanked him throat first across the top rope. Orton was tagged in and he dropkicked Punk. Orton tagged in Helms, who put Punk in a front facelock and hit some knees to the head. Orton tagged in, and Punk traded punches with him. Punk missed a punch and Orton hit the RKO. Orton went for the cover, but Michaels broke it up. Edge tagged in and went for the spear, but Punk dodged it and Edge hit the turnbuckles. Punk made the hot tag to Triple H as Edge tagged Helms. Triple H gave Helms a jumping knee, then gave one to Orton, knocking him from the ring. Triple H set up Helms for a Pedigree, but Edge broke it up. Things broke down, but Michaels & Jeff gave Orton and Edge stereo dives on the floor, while in the ring, Triple H gave Helms a spinebuster. Triple H tagged in Matt, who hit the Twist of Fate. Jeff then gave Helms a Swanton Bomb, and Matt made the cover for the pin. Gregory Helms is eliminated at the ten minute mark.
Edge & Randy Orton grabbed their tag belts, and seeing the disadvantage, started to leave. The Hardys went after them and threw them back into the ring. Triple H knocked Orton to the floor. Edge was given a jumping knee by Punk, Air Hardy by Jeff, and Michaels hit a superkick on him for the pin. Edge is eliminated at the eleven minute mark. Randy Orton tried to run out through the crowd, but the Hardys and Punk gave chase, caught him, and brought him back to the ring. Michaels hit a superkick, Triple H hit a pedigree, and Orton was pinned.
Survivors – Triple H, Shawn Michaels, CM Punk, Jeff Hardy and Matt Hardy
Backstage, Kristal interviewed Ken Kennedy, who said this was the biggest match of his career. MVP entered and asked what was on Kennedy’s forehead. Kennedy said it was Vaseline, and they put over that it can be used to stop bleeding. MVP said that even though Kennedy threw him to the Brothers Of Destruction twice, he was on a “new kick” having beaten Kane, and that he had Kennedy’s back tonight.
First Blood Match
Kennedy came to the ring and immediately took the pads off of two of the top turnbuckles, then did his usual self-introduction. The Undertaker then did his usual entrance. Kennedy rolled to the floor at the bell, and Undertaker gave chase. Kennedy rolled into the ring and attacked as Taker rolled in, but the punches had no effect. Taker decked Kennedy and threw him to the floor. Taker rammed Kennedy into the Spanish announcers table.
Taker hit a series of punches, as Kennedy was stuck behind the table. Taker rammed him into the table a few more times, then tossed him over it and to the floor. Taker rammed Kennedy into the ring steps, then punched him, knocking him over the security barricade and to the floor. Undertaker hit two headbutts, then hiptossed Kennedy back into the ringside area. Taker booted Kennedy in the head. Taker went for a whip, but Kennedy reversed it and Taker went knees first into the steps. Kennedy rammed Taker into the Raw announcers table, then the Smackdown announcers table. Kennedy hit some chops, then jumped off the ring apron at Taker. Taker caught Kennedy and rammed him back first into the ring post. Undertaker hit some punches to the back, then tossed Kennedy into the ring. Taker punched and kicked Kennedy in the back, then sat him on the top turnbuckle and slugged him. Undertaker gave Kennedy a top rope superplex, then went back to punching Kennedy in the ribs and back. Kennedy hit a low blow, then delivered some punches, but Taker took him down with a boot to the face.
Undertaker rammed Kennedy face first into the exposed turnbuckle, then hit some body shots to the back. Taker kicked at his ribs, but Kennedy hit a low mule kick to down Undertaker. Kennedy rolled to the floor, and started spitting blood on the floor. MVP ran out with a towel to clean up the spot on the floor and Kennedy wiped his mouth with it as well. The referee, checking Taker in the ring, didn’t see it. MVP started walking Kennedy up the aisle, saying “You don’t need to do this”, then turned around and threw Kennedy back into the ring. Undertaker hit some shots to the body and a boot to the face. MVP stayed in the aisle, enjoying that he had prolonged Kennedy’s beating. Undertaker hit some shots in the corner, and Kennedy went for a Hotshot on the exposed turnbuckle, but it sort of missed. Kennedy rammed Undertaker into the corner, but Taker wasn’t busted open. Kennedy and Undertaker exchanged punches.
MVP ran in with a chair, looking to hit Kennedy, but the referee grabbed the chair. MVP shoved the referee out of the ring and swung the chair, but caught Undertaker instead. Undertaker got up, bleeding a gusher, and stalked MVP around the ring. Kennedy charged Taker and hit some punches as the referee got back in, and MVP left. The referee saw the blood on Taker’s head and called for the bell at the ten minute mark.
Winner – Mr. Kennedy
Kennedy pounded down a bloody Taker, then called for his microphone to announce himself as the winner. Kennedy stood over Taker as he did it, and Taker sat up and grabbed his throat. Undertaker pounded Kennedy down in a corner, then picked up the chair and blasted Kennedy in the head with it. The chair shot was so brutal, there was a “Holy S***” chant. Taker put Kennedy on the Spanish announcers table and pounded him, then threw him back into the ring. Undertaker gave Kennedy a tombstone, and Kennedy was now bleeding from the head as well. Taker took off his glove and started punching Kennedy in the forehead with his no fist. Taker then posed, as the referee pulled a bloody Kennedy from the ring.
Backstage, Queen Sharmell gave King Booker a peptalk. Booker said Batista was “clinging to a dream that will never come to pass”. Booker said there would be no “fairytale ending” for Batista tonight.
Survivor Series Elimination Match
MVP (looking nervous), Test, Umaga, Finlay (who had his shillelagh taken away by a referee as he came out) and Big Show each made separate entrances, then Rob Van Dam, Sabu, Bobby Lashley, Kane and John Cena made their entrances.
Ross and Lawler called this Survivor match as well. Cena started out with Umaga. Cena ducked a charge and Umaga went into Cena’s corner, but he decked Sabu and RVD. Cena threw Umaga from the ring, and pulled Finlay in. RVD was tagged in and he gave Finlay a corkscrew legdrop. Umaga grabbed a television monitor and he hit Cena, RVD and Sabu with it. Umaga laid out Cena on the floor. Kane and Lashley started brawling with Test and MVP, while the referee ordered Umaga out. Umaga is eliminated via DQ at the one minute mark.
The match settled down, with Finlay going at it with RVD, hitting a sitdown splash before tagging Test. RVD mounted a comeback on Test, but Test caught a bodypress attempt and gave him a backbreaker. Finlay tagged back in and hit an elbowdrop on Van Dam. MVP tagged in and stomped Van Dam, then put him in a chinlock. RVD was bleeding from the mouth. RVD elbowed out, kicked away a backdrop attempt, and cradled MVP for a two count. RVD hit MVP with a spinkick. Van Dam hit a back kick, then gave Test a thrust kick as he came in. Finlay ran in, and RVD kicked him as well. Van Dam then kicked Big Show’s legs out on the apron before he could come in. Van Dam was tripped and pulled to the floor by Test. In the ring, Kane grabbed MVP and chokeslammed him. Van Dam got back in, gave MVP a five star frog splash and pinned him. Test then gave RVD a big boot and pinned him. MVP, then RVD, are eliminated at the six minute mark.
Sabu cradled Test for a two count. Test sent Sabu to the floor, then went out after him, but Lashley gave him a spear on the outside. Test was thrown back into the ring, and Sabu hit a slingshot legdrop, then a tornado DDT on Test for the pin. Test is eliminated at the seven minute mark. Big Show came in and chokeslammed Sabu, then pinned him. Sabu is eliminated at the seven minute mark. Big Show and Kane faced off, and grabbed each other by the throat. The Little Bastard came in, stood between them, then left. This distracted the referee, and Finlay came in with a new shillelagh and hit Kane with it. Show chokeslammed Kane and pinned him. Kane is eliminated at the eight minute mark.
Show powerslammed John Cena, then tagged in Finlay, who worked over Cena before tagging Show back in. Show hit some chops in the corner, then Finlay tagged in and gave Cena a shoulderblock in the corner. Finlay came off the middle rope, but Cena got a boot up, then made the hot tag to Lashley. Lashley hit some clotheslines and elbows on Finlay, then set up for the powerslam. Finlay floated out of it, but Lashley caught him with an exploder suplex. Lashley covered, but Show broke it up. Cena came in and he and Lashley went to double team Show, but Show clotheslined them down. Finlay grabbed the Little Bastard and was going to throw him at Lashley, but Lashley speared Finlay, and the Little Bastard went into Cena’s arms. Lashley pinned Finlay. Finlay is eliminated at the eleven minute mark.
Cena went to FU the Little Bastard, but Show kicked him and Bastard got away. Lashley gave Show a shoulderblock, then he and Cena gave Show a double suplex (Cena couldn’t do it alone). Cena did the Five Knuckle Shuffle fistdrop. Fans are booing Cena. Show got up and grabbed Cena by the throat. Lashley came in and shoulderblocked Show to break his grip, and Cena lifted Big Show (which is very impressive) and gave Show the FU, to a pop, for the pin at the thirteen minute mark.
Survivors – John Cena and Bobby Lashley
Out comes Teddy Long. Long reminded us that if Batista doesn’t win, he doesn’t get another title shot. Long said, however, if Booker gets DQ-ed or gets counted out, he’ll lose the belt. I guess the writers have been watching TNA?
World Title Match: Batista vs. King Booker (with Queen Sharmell).
Batista went after King Booker as he made his way down to the ring. Batista beat down on Booker on the arena floor, as referee Nick Patrick told Batista to move it to the center of the ring. Patrick finally rang the bell, so the matches officially started. Booker bailed out of the ring, but Sharmell reminded her King that he couldn’t get counted out tonight. Fans are not into this match. Batista rammed Booker into the steel ring steps on the outside as Sharmell argued with Patrick. Flying tackle by Batista, but Booker kicked out. Spinbuster, King Booker kicked out again. Book End by Booker, but Batista kicked out. Batista bomb, but Booker grabs the bottom rope before the 3 count. Sharmell gives the title belt to Booker. Batista grabs the belt from Booker and uses it against him and pins Booker at 13:57. New champion is Batista.