No Mercy opened up with a video package highlighting the “new and improved” Eddie Guerrero, and his “friendship” with Batista and the Handicap Casket Match between the Undertaker and the Orton’s. The fireworks then went off in the arena for the start of the show as Michael Cole and Tazz welcomed us to the show live in Houston, Texas!
Six Person Tag Team Match
The music of MNM hit in the arena as Joey Mercury, Johnny Nitro and Melina made their way to the ring set for six person tag team action against Christy Hemme and the WWE Tag Team Champions, Heidenreich and Road Warrior Animal.
Heidenreich grabbed Nitro from the outside and pulled him into the ring. Animal started off with a big boot, and his shoulder is taped up after last weeks Smackdown. Heidenreich tagged in and nailed some left and right jabs and then a huge clothesline for two. Animal tagged back in and they nailed a double back elbow to knock Nitro down and then Animal scored with a clothesline on the corner.
Animal missed a splash in the corner and then Nitro went after the shoulder and tagged in Mercury who drove his shoulder into the turnbuckle. Mercury nailed some big kicks to the shoulder and nailed a cheapshot on Heidenreich on the apron. MNM connected with the Snap Shot on Animal but the referee was distracted trying to get Mercury out of the ring and when he finally got to make the count, Animal kicked out at two. Nitro tagged back in and worked the shoulder of Animal in the ropes and then Mercury snapped it across the ropes and Nitro covered for two.
Nitro distracted the referee while Melina locked in a headscissors on Animal while he was in the ropes. Mercury tagged in and hit a double axe handle off the ropes onto the shoulder of Animal and then continued to work the injured body part. Mercury scored with a neck breaker for another near fall and then went up top and dived off but Animal caught him and nailed a powerslam for two when Nitro broke the fall. Heidenreich came in to take care of Nitro, but Nitro backdropped him to the outside and then dived off the apron onto him but Heidenreich moved and Nitro hit the barricade.
Melina tagged in and dived off the ropes onto Animal, but he caught her and then tagged in Christy. Animal held Melina up while Christy clotheslined her and then nailed a boot to the face followed by a huricanrana. Animal got inside and called for the Doomsday Device. He got Melina on his shoulders and Christy went up top and they nailed it! Christy covered for the win!
Winners – Christy Hemme and the Legion of Doom
Mercury carried Melina to the back while LOD and Christy celebrated their huge win in the ring.
Batista is shown backstage in his locker room and Eddie Guerrero comes in. Eddie says he has one thing to say to him, and wished him good luck. Batista then wished Eddie good luck, and Eddie doesn’t look to be in a good mood here tonight.
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Footage is shown of the Legion of Doom and Christy joining Josh Mathews in the back for a new feature on WWE.com!
The music of Simon Dean hit in the arena as he made his way down on the Dean Machine, with some dude following behind with a plate of hamburgers. He gets on the mic and says that he was shocked to read in a fitness magazine that they ranked Houston the fattest city in America. He says he has 20 double cheeseburgers. He says he likes one every now and then, and if you ate only one you’d be ok nutritionally, but it’s when slobs like you sit and eat 20 cheeseburgers in a sitting is when you become fat and pathetic. He then called Lashley pathetic, and says if he doesn’t win tonight, he will eat all 20 of those cheeseburgers! The music of Lashley then hit as he made his way down for his PPV debut!
They locked it up and Lashley threw Dean to the corner and then nailed him with a big clothesline. Dean went for a cheapshot but Lashley hooked him and hit a belly to belly and then worked over Dean in the corner. Lashley went for a splash but Dean moved and then grabbed some burgers and threw them at the referee and then nailed Lashley with the trey! It had no effect on Lashley and he pulled Dean right out of the corner onto his shoulder, but slipped and dropped him. Lashley picked him back up and then nailed the Dominator for the win.
Winner – Bobby Lashley
Lashley shoved a hamburger down Dean’s throat and then made his way to the back victorious.
Steve Romero is backstage and Jillian Hall introduces JBL. Romero asks him about the rumors that stars of RAW will invade No Mercy tonight. JBL said it was impossible, as they are all invited. If they want to find out how good they are against a wrestling god, they should watch what he does tonight to the jumping bean, and facts are facts and underdogs simply do not win. Rey Mysterio showed up and spoke in Spanish and JBL said this is America, and he should speak English. Rey said he brought a present for him, and it’s a mask. He said after the underdog beats him tonight, JBL will want to hide his face in shame. JBL wouldn’t take it, and said if he doesn’t need it, he knows someone who does, and handed it to Jillian!
United States Championship Match
The music of Sharmell hit in the arena as she made her way to the ring to introduce her man, and the next United States Champion, Booker T. The music of Christian then hit as he made his way down, followed by Orlando Jordan and then the United States Champion, Chris Benoit.
They started off with Christian working over Booker while Benoit paired off with Jordan. Christian and Orlando worked over Booker while Benoit was sent to the outside. Orlando held Booker as Christian took some shots but then came back with a double clothesline. Christian was tossed to the outside and then Booker nailed the shuffle side kick to knock Orlando down. Booker hit some right hands and then Christian tripped Booker from the outside and tossed him hard into the steps.
Benoit grabbed the Crossface out of nowhere in the ring on Jordan but Christian broke it up. Benoit went to work with chops on Christian and Orlando. Benoit nailed a slam on Orlando and then a snap suplex on Christian. Benoit threw Jordan onto Christian and then chopped away at Jordan in the corner. Christian came from behind but Benoit hit a drop toe hold on him and his head nailed Jordan’s privates. Christian and Orlando came back on Benoit and then Booker came in with a missile dropkick on Christian. Booker went to work on Jordan and then catapulted him into Christian on the apron and both were sent outside. Booker and Benoit stared each other down in the ring and they tied up with Booker backing him to the corner and breaking clean. Christian and Orlando then hit the ring and Benoit tossed Christian back to the outside with a belly to belly and then Jordan sent Benoit out and went to work on Booker. Jordan choked Booker in the ropes and then nailed some jabs before both men went down with a double clothesline.
Benoit went up top and went for the headbutt but Christian climbed up to stop him and they fought it out on the top rope. Booker was then whipped to the corner by Jordan and Benoit and Christian went flying! Booker then rolled Jordan up out of nowhere for a very near fall! Booker nailed a back elbow knockdown and then a spinebuster for two when Christian broke the fall. Booker nailed a kick to the jaw on Christian and then hit a side kick on Benoit. Booker did the spinaroonie and then nailed the Scissors Kick on Jordan and made the cover but Christian broke it. Benoit came from behind and then Christian threw Benoit into Booker and Booker was sent outside. Christian went for the Unprettier on Benoit but Benoit countered into a German and went for another but Jordan came in and nailed both of them. Jordan blocked a German attempt from Benoit and then Benoit tossed him outside into Booker.
Benoit nailed another German on Christian and then nailed a series of three German’s on Christian before heading up top for the headbutt but Christian moved! Christian went for a rollup but Benoit countered and went for the Crossface and got it locked in and Christian has nowhere to go. Jordan then hit the ring and broke the hold and Booker is back in as well. Booker and Orlando were tossed back outside again, and Christian went for the Unprettier on Benoit but Benoit rolled through and picked the legs and locked in the Sharpshooter and Christian taps!
Winner and still United States Champion, Chris Benoit
Benoit celebrated his victory and Sharmell looked very disappointed that Booker T didn’t come out on top. Sharmell bitched at Booker and said Benoit made him lose and told him that he needs to start listening to her.
Simon Dean is shown backstage and Bobby Lashley is making him eat the cheeseburgers. Dean is bitching, and trying to get out of it but Lashley was having none of it.
Referee: Nick Patrick
The music of Ken Kennedy hit in the arena as he made his way to the ring for this one on one match with Hardcore Holly, and this is Kennedy’s PPV debut. Kennedy cut Chimel off before he could announce him and then the mic came down from the rafters as Kennedy introduced himself as usual.
Hardcore brought Kennedy in the hard way and then went to work with right hands and stomps. Holly nailed a nice vertical suplex for two and then clubbed him in the back of the neck. Holly worked over Kennedy in the corner and then choked him with his boot. Kennedy came back with a knee to the gut and some right hands of his own but then Holly nailed the best dropkick in the business.
Holly chopped away at Kennedy in the corner, and then chopped him in each corner but Kennedy hit a shot to the gut and threw Holly to the outside. Kennedy pulled Holly shoulder first into the ring post and then tossed him back inside and covered for just one. Kennedy worked the shoulder and then hit a back suplex for two. Kennedy locked in an arm bar on Holly and when Holly broke it, Kennedy came back with a huge clothesline for two. Holly came back with some huge chops but Kennedy dropped him with a arm bar takedown for two. Kennedy went back to the shoulder with an inside key lock but Holly came back with a back body drop. Holly nailed some back elbow knockdowns and then hit the full nelson slam for two.
Holly hit a clothesline in the corner, and then did the same in the other corner. Holly hit the kick to the gut spot while Kennedy was hanging over the ropes and covered for a near fall. Kennedy went for a wheel kick but Holly blocked and then nailed him and covered for two. Holly went up top but Kennedy caught him up there with right hands and then hit the Lambeau Leap for the win!
Winner – Ken Kennedy
Kennedy announced himself as the winner of the match, and he is still undefeated here on the Smackdown brand! The referee called to the back for some help for Holly and a bunch of referees and a trainer made their way down. Holly screamed that he didn’t need their help. The music of Sylvan then hit as he made his way down. Sylvan acted concerned for Holly and then kicked him in the ribs and drove a knee into the gut and tossed him into the ring. Sylvan continued to drive his knee into the ribs of Holly and then kicked him low. Sylvan then nailed his hanging brain buster and acted all proud of himself.
Lashley and Simon Dean are shown backstage again, and he is still making Dean eat the burgers, and one had a huge hair in it!
Sharmell is shown with Booker bitching at him because Benoit won. She said Benoit is a winner, he’s the United States Champion. She said he had his shot, but his friend stole…Kennedy then comes in and says we interrupt this dispute to bring you some shocking news! He says in his very first ever WWE PPV, Mr. Kennnnnnnnnnnnnnedyyyyyyy…Kennnnnnnnnnnneddddy…wins! Winnnnnnnner…Looooooser. Sharmell said Kennedy is not his problem and neither is Benoit. She said his problem is him. Booker looked pissed.
The music of JBL hit in the arena as he made his way out in the limo with Jillian Hall, and he is set for singles action against Rey Mysterio.
JBL shoved Rey to the corner and Rey came back with right hands and kicks. Bradshaw came back with a side headlock takedown and Rey found it hard to escape. Rey finally escaped it but JBL came back with a shoulder block and then went for an elbow drop but Rey moved and sent JBL to the outside. JBL chased Rey in and out of the ring and JBL was blowing up while chasing Rey and then nailed a baseball slide to JBL on the outside.
Rey played to the crowd but JBL came in and kicked him in the back and then went to work with some clubs to the back. Rey came back with a dropkick to the knee for two and then kicked at the leg of JBL before working over the leg. Rey kicked at the hamstring of Bradshaw and then worked it over in the ropes. Bradshaw came back with a thumb to the eye and then nailed some right hands but Rey came back with a tilt a whirl headscissors. Rey went for a 619 but JBL moved and then Rey went for a plancha onto Bradshaw on the outside but he held Jillian in front of him. Rey then hit a bulldog off the apron onto JBL on the outside.
JBL picked the ankle of Rey and he went head first into the steel right steps and then rolled him back inside for two. Bradshaw worked Rey in the corner with repeated right hands and then Rey tried to come back and went up top but Bradshaw cut him off and hit a fallaway slam from the top and then picked Rey up again and scored with another fallaway slam on Mysterio. Rey went to the outside and Bradshaw followed and proceeded to nail a third fallaway slam on the outside! Bradshaw tossed Rey back inside and covered for a near fall.
JBL worked over Rey in the corner with knees to the mid section and then grabbed a bear hug. Rey escaped with a tornado DDT and then hit a springboard crossbody and then a low dropkick. Rey went for mounted punches but JBL picked him up for a powerbomb but Rey hammered him with right hands and escaped and then nailed the bronco buster! Jillian got on the apron and Rey was distracted. Bradshaw went for Rey, but Rey moved and Bradshaw almost nailed Jillian!
Rey went up top and came off with a moonsault onto a standing Bradshaw for a near fall but then Bradshaw came back with a shoulder knockdown.Bradshaw went for the clothesline from hell, but Rey nailed a dropkick and then hit the 619! Rey went for the West Coast Pop, but Bradshaw ducked under and then hit the clothesline from hell out of nowhere for the win!
Winner – John Bradshaw Layfield
Handicap Casket Match
The music of Randy Orton hit in the arena as he made his way to the ring with his father, Cowboy Bob Orton, for this first ever Handicap Casket Match against the Undertaker! The druid music hit after the Orton’s entrance, as they wheeled the casket down to ringside before the Undertaker made his entrance.
Taker nailed both with right hands and then went to work on Randy in the corner and then got Bob in there too and nailed him with rights. Bob fell on top of the casket but Randy then hit a low blow. Orton nailed a knee drop and then Bob held him for Randy to nail some right hands. Randy then held Taker for Bob to score with a big right hand and then Randy nailed a big time uppercut.
Taker fought back with right hands and went to toss Randy into the casket but he held onto the ropes. Taker nailed Bob and then went back after Randy and sent him to the outside. Taker then threw Bob into the casket and went back to Randy but Randy drove him knee first into the ring steps. Orton stomped away at Taker on the outside and then drove him head first into the announce table, and then the ring steps. Randy tossed Taker back in the ring and Bob is out of the casket now and then both tried to shove Taker into the casket and he was half in but Taker stopped the lid from being closed and nailed both Orton’s and climbed out.
Taker went to work on both men and then unloaded on Bob in the corner with a right hand and then went after Randy and scored with Old School. Taker hit the STO on Randy and then Bob went for a right hand but Taker blocked it and worked over his shoulder and went for old school, but Randy crotched him. Bob went up with Randy and Taker nailed both with right hands but they got the better of Taker and the Orton’s hit a double superplex! Bob went for a cover and then realised he needs to get Taker in the casket. The lid was lifted and they went to double suplex him into it but Taker blocked and dropped them both with DDT’s!
Taker shoved Bob into the casket and then hit the snake eyes on Randy before hitting him with a running big boot, and Bob is out of the casket again. Taker went for the Tombstone but Randy fell out the back but Taker came back with a clothesline. Randy came back with his modified backbreaker and Bob has a fire extinguisher on the outside. Randy tossed Taker to the outside and caught Randy off the apron and drove him spine first into the ring post. Taker nailed Bob with a big boot and then grabbed a steel chair. Taker nailed Randy in the back with it, sending him into the casket, and then went after Bob and locked in a triangle choke and tried to pull him over the side of the casket!
They are both in the casket and all Taker has to do is close the lid but Randy blocks it and then nails some right hands. All three men are now in the casket as Randy and Taker traded right hands and both climb out. Taker closed the lid on Bob and then tossed Randy into the ring. Orton nailed a powerslam and then dragged Taker towards the casket and stared down at his father in there, and it freaked him out. Taker then nailed him with a low blow and then stomped away at him. Taker hit right hands in the corner and then a big boot but then Orton came back with a beautiful dropkick!
Orton hammered Taker in the corner with mounted forearms to the chest and then mounted him again in the corner and got cocky and Taker went for the Last Ride, but Orton fell out the back and then Taker nailed him again and connected with the Last Ride! Taker signalled for the end and went to throw Randy in, but Bob came out and shot the fire extinguisher right in the face of the Taker! Randy then nailed the RKO and Taker is out of it. Bob pushed Taker towards the casket but then Taker grabbed him by the throat! Taker went for the chokeslam but Orton came out of nowhere with the fire extinguisher and Taker fell into the casket!
Orton went to close the lid but Taker stopped him. Bob then closed the lid and Randy and Taker are both in there! The lid then opened again and Taker has Randy by the neck but Bob nailed him from behind and then Randy nailed Taker in the head with a chair and closed the lid! The Orton’s have beat the Deadman!
Winners – Randy Orton and Cowboy Bob Orton
The Orton’s padlocked the casket shut and then started rolling it the back. They stomped in the ramp and Bob went backstage and brought an axe back out with him. Randy took the axe and started yelling at Taker through the casket, and then started to chop away at the casket with the axe! Bob then went to the back and came back out with a can of gasoline and Randy stood on top of the casket and laid the gasoline all over it and into the hole he made with the axe. Bob then handed Randy a lighter and set the damn thing on fire! The casket became a huge inferno and then finally some guys come out to extinguish it.
Cruiserweight Championship Match
The music of the Mexicools hit in the arena as Juventud, Psicosis and Super Crazy made their way to the ring on their lawmowers, and Juventud is set for a shot at the Cruiserweight Title against Nunzio. Juventud earned this shot winning a cruiserweight battle royal this past week on Velocity on WWE.com. Nunzio was accompanied by Vito as usual.
Juvy and Nunzio locked up and Juvy got a quick rollup for two, and then a backslide for one and then another rollup for two, followed by a small package. Juvy nailed some chops but Nunzio came back with a side headlock and then Juvy hit a boot to the face followed by a tilt a whirl headscissors for two. Juvy nailed a slam into a backbreaker for a near fall.
Juvy went up top but Nunzio threw him down and covered for two. Nunzio nailed some elbow drops and then locked in a surfboard. Juvy hit a rollup off the shoulders of Nunzio for two and then Nunzio came back with a side Italian leg sweep for two. Both men are on the top rope and both men drove their own heads into the mat as the Mexicools and Vito cheered on their guys. Nunzio draped his arm over for two and then Juvy rolled Nunzio up for two. Juvy hit some boots to the jaw in the corner and then hit a jumping spin kick to knock Nunzio down. Nunzio hit a sunset flip but Juvy rolled through with a dropkick to the head for two. Juvy scored with a shining wizard and then a reverse face first powerbomb for two.
Nunzio went for the Sicilian Slice but no one was home. Juvy was backdropped to the apron and Vito grabbed his ankle. Juvy went for a sunset flip over the top and then Juvy rolled onto Vito on the outside and nailed him with a headscissors! Juvy went up top and hit a crossbody but Nunzio rolled through for a near fall! Juvy hit a Northern Lights and rolled through and then nailed the Juvy Driver and we have a new Cruiserweight Champion!
Winner – Juventud
Juventud and the Mexicools celebrated the victory and the Spanish Announcers then interviewed Juvy in Spanish on the outside. I think Psicosis said “your ass is grass and we are the lawnmowers”, or something like that. Next.
Simon Dean is still eating the cheeseburgers backstage, and he’s finally eaten them all! Lashley says that was only 19, and they found one more for him. Lashley made him eat it, and then Dean bolted and you could hear him heaving in the bathroom.
World Heavyweight Championship Match
The music of Eddie Guerrero hit in the arena as he made his way out to the ring for his shot at the World Heavyweight Championship against his “friend”, Batista.
The two squared off in the middle of the ring and Guerrero went for a single leg, and then a double leg to take Batista down but Batista kicked him off. They locked up again and Guerrero nailed a fireman’s carry which led to another face off. Another lock up and this time it’s a test of strength with Batista easily coming out on top. Batista backed Eddie to the corner and Guerrero climbed the middle rope and kicked at Batista but Batista threw him off to the middle of the ring and then Guerrero bailed to the outside.
Back inside, and Batista grabbed a side headlock and Eddie tried to throw him off but Batista held on. Eddie backed Batista to the corner and drove some shoulders to the mid section. Batista came back and went for a splash but Eddie moved. Another lock up and Batista went back to the side headlock and Eddie tried to escape with a top wrist lock but Batista was too powerful. Eddie escaped with elbows but then ran into a shoulder block and then a pair of scoop slams for two. Eddie went to the outside and grabbed a chair and then threw it back down. Batista grabbed Eddie by the throat and yelled at him about the chair, and then Eddie hotshotted him on the ropes and quickly went up top and came off with the frogsplash to the back of Batista and covered but Batista kicked out!
Eddie kicked at the kidney area of Batista and then wrapped him a body scissors and pulled back on the head of Batista. Batista fought to his feet with Eddie still on his back and then backed him into the corner but Eddie came back with a dropkick to the back of Batista. Eddie locked in a single leg crab but Batista made the ropes. Eddie took the tag rope off the corner, but then thought better of it and dropkicked Batista in the head and locked in another body scissors on the champion, as well as a rear chin lock. Batista fought up again and then grabbed Eddie in a bear hug. Eddie fought out quickly and then nailed a kick to the face but Batista got pissed and charged at Eddie, but Eddie nailed a drop kick to the knee.
Eddie went for a Texas Cloverleaf but Batista rolled him up for a near fall. Eddie hammered away at the lower back and then backed Batista to the corner. Batista charged at Eddie in the corner, but Eddie leapfrogged and stumbled into the referee to knock him down, and then laid out Batista with a DDT. Eddie then smiled and went to the outside and grabbed a steel chair but then started to have second thoughts. Eddie went for it, but again stopped himself and tossed the chair out. Batista is now up and saw the chair, and questioned him about it. Eddie said he threw it out and then nailed Batista with right hands but Batista drove him into the corner and nailed some shoulder thrusts and then a huge clothesline and back body drop.
Batista nailed Eddie with a spear and the referee is up again now. Batista went for the Batista Bomb but Eddie floated out and went for the sunset flip but Batista blocked it and then nailed the spinebuster! Batista crawled over to the cover but Eddie kicked out! Batista went for an elbow drop but Eddie got his knee up and then nailed the three amigos and headed up top. Eddie came off with the Frog splash but Batista moved and Eddie rolled through but then walked into the spinebuster by Batista for the win!
Winner and still World Heavyweight Champion, Batista
Batista celebrated his win, and then pulled Eddie up and held his title high. Eddie put out his hand for a handshake and Batista took it and they shook hands in the middle of the ring. Batista then turned his back on Eddie, expecting a cheap shot, but it didn’t come. Eddie left the ring and the bottom line is that Batista is still the World Heavyweight Champion.
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