The Ross Report – Crypic Messages, Angle, & More News

Ryan Clark


Greetings from under the black, 200X Resistol hat! We’re burning daylight, so let’s get this show on the road …

Important business first: I never contemplated suicide after my Sooners took one on the chin at home in Norman against the TCU Horned Frogs. However, I was in denial and shock – much as I felt a few months after my second marriage.

I have to admit I got on “the sauce” pretty heavy after the Sooners’ season-opening loss. First, there was the BBQ sauce, then some off-branded – I’m so ashamed – generic steak sauce! I promise to clean up my act.

Don’t be surprised to see Texas win Saturday night at Ohio State . Speed kills. I want Texas to be unbeaten when they play Oklahoma on Oct. 8, in Dallas . L.O.D. Animal’s son James Laurinaitis played some at linebacker last Saturday for the Buckeyes as a true freshman. Vader’s son Jesse White may be redshirted at OU this season. White is strong as a bull and an excellent center prospect, wearing No. 66.

Waco , Texas gets Monday Night RAW on Sept. 26, replacing the Hurricane Katrina-ravaged Biloxi , Miss. Laredo , Texas gets SmackDown on Sept. 27, replacing New Orleans . Please help these displaced families who have lost everything in any way you can. If you have already contributed, thank you, and if not, WHY?

A gentleman in an airport asked me the other day if Chris Masters reminds me of a young Lex Luger. I politely answered, “HELL NO!” (Just joking, even though that’s what I was thinking.) Masters already understands his job better than Luger at a comparable age.

Internet observation of the week: “Ric Flair is a pervert for grabbing Carlito’s privates!” Sure he is. Now, turn off your computer and go to bed.

Dick Murdoch was one of the Top 5 in-ring hands I ever saw … when he wanted to be and when he took his business seriously. I loved old Dickie like a brother and cried when he died a few years ago. Dick Murdoch was special. He could wrestle, he could brawl and he could talk. He wouldn’t win any body building contests, but who cares, in all honesty? I truly hope Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch can find the magic that the original Texas Outlaws of Dick Murdoch and Dusty Rhodes developed over time. That’s a helluva tall order, but that would be my goal if I were Cade or Murdoch.

Promoter Cowboy Bill Watts once fined Dick Murdoch every dollar he earned over a two-week period except for one lone dollar! That’s right, Dickie made $1 for two weeks worth of work because he was late for work two or three times and he clowned around in an important – at least to Big Cowboy – match. Dickie told me he was going to get even with Watts by never cashing the check, therefore, Watts checkbook could never be balanced. I miss you Dick, even though you loved those danged Texas Longhorns.

Damn, is Kurt Angle on a roll, or what? In all due respect to several WWE Superstars, including WWE Champion John Cena, I don’t know if I would bet against Angle vs. anyone based on what I’ve seen since SummerSlam. I’m not forgetting Angle’s victory over HBK at WrestleMania, but over the past month, the Olympian has been virtually untouchable.

I’m excited about Unforgiven being held in my home state of Oklahoma , and I hope I make it out of the Ford Center on Sept. 18, without getting my ass kicked … again!

It’s going to be very interesting to see the evolution of several younger wrestlers on both RAW and SmackDown. I am encouraged by some. One thing is for sure: any young, potential WWE Superstar better understand ASAP that this a seven-day-a-week cycle of preparation in one form or another; focusing on this career opportunity part-time will not get them to big money and longevity. Even if a wrestler takes a day or two off to physically rest, studying tapes of the great ones isn’t to physically taxing.

Check out The Coach this weekend on CSTV doing play-by-play for a college football game. Remember, ” Topeka ,” they’re called sound bytes. My congrats to Coach. I wonder if he will wear his shades on camera. I think his game starts at 6 p.m. (ET).

Have you read, “Scooter,” yet? Check it out and let me know your thoughts. For being such a wonderful husband, dad and son, there must be some small, isolated part of Mick Foley that is very dark to have written such a disturbing and totally realistic work of fiction. It’s a legit page-turner.

RAW may be entertaining our troops in Iraq (or so we hope) in December. This is not etched in stone, but I hope it happens. I would love to volunteer to go.

I’m begging for a good two-out-of-three fall match on TV.

Too many young wrestlers have the basic same look, tattoos, hair, etc. Individuality is seemingly becoming a lost art. This business is so much more than a mullet, a few tattoos, some baby oil and the willingness to execute untimely high-risk maneuvers just for the hell of it.

Jake Roberts’ father, Grizzly Smith, was missing in New Orleans for several days following Hurricane Katrina, but, thankfully, he was found alive.

Why do some wrestlers wear jewelry such as earrings in the ring? I just don’t get it.

Does anyone outside San Francisco care if Barry Bonds plays baseball this season or not?

Lance Russell’s home on the gulf coast was not destroyed, and our friend Lance and his wife Audrey are okay despite the result of America ‘s most infamous natural disaster.

Will the Edge-Hardy Steel Cage Match at Unforgiven “steal the show?” Don’t bet against it.

Fans are invited to attend a huge Unforgiven press conference this Tuesday morning at Oklahoma City ‘s Ford Center at 10 a.m. I hope to see you there.

Rob Conway has the ring skills to be a star. He must be tougher than a government mule, or he wouldn’t be man enough to wear those tights.

In my personal opinion, Brock Lesnar is making a big mistake by not accepting WWE’s very fair contract offer.

Does ESPN’s Trev Alberts, a Nebraska alum, annoy you as much as he does me?

It’s nice to see Dusty Rhodes back working behind the cameras for WWE. I would love to host a DVD of the “Dream’s” favorite matches. Dusty is a future WWE Hall of Famer in my view.

Are you excited about the U.S. Open tennis tournament? Me neither?

In my opinion, no team has a better shot at making the Super Bowl this year than the New England Patriots.

We are looking forward to our October International tour. I’ll head to the UK right after the OU game at Texas Tech. Busy weekend for yours truly.

As a fan, I would love to see more emphasis put on SmackDown’s cruiserweight division. There’s lots of talented athletes in that weight class.

I think I should be paid a royalty when football announcers use the term “slobberknocker.”

Let’s get to your e-mails …

From: Jeff Starks

Mohammed Hassan and Daivari have been banned. While they caused a lot of controversy, they had potential. Do you think we will see them return as different characters in the future?

I hope so and am optimistic that will happen at some point in time. I agree with you, Jeff, that both these young men have potential. New stars must be cultivated for the long-term success of WWE, and these two could contribute, in time.

From: Andrew Lister

Dear Mr. Ross,

My name’s Andy and I’ve been doing play-by-play commentary for an independent federation in Scott County , Iowa . I have to say that you are one of my biggest influences as a commentator, and I hope to one day be as talented and knowledgeable as you are. I have to ask you, as one PBP guy to another, what words of wisdom would you have for a guy like me? What sort of things do you do to make yourself one of the best in the business?

I’ve never understood why more young broadcasters have not aggressively pursued jobs with WWE TV. Opportunity is knocking. Someone else will be doing play-by-play on RAW someday (not anytime soon, I hope), but who will it be? Andrew, never not be a fan of wrestling, study all the tapes you can, recognize match situations and transitions and out-prepare and work harder at being better than your peers. Plus, good luck never hurts.

From: Jason

JR,

First of all, it was a tough loss for the Oklahoma Sooners this past weekend. It will be a tough season for them this season. My question is this…If one former WWE Superstar could return to RAW or SmackDown, who would you want that to be and why? Who would make the biggest impact?

The Sooners played with no passion against a solid, well-coached TCU team. Eliminate the passion from any equation and one usually fails – no matter the endeavor. Stone Cold or The Rock returning and being involved in a spirited, personal issue would be awesome, especially if it played out over time.

From: Joey Fiscella

Hi Mr. Ross…I am and always will be a huge Ultimate Warrior fan. I have watched wrestling since I was 4 and I’m wondering if you think we’ll ever see him in a WWE ring again?

Not very likely. Warrior, and that is his legal name, does not appear to be a big fan of this organization. His frequent rants seem to indicate much. His charisma and “look” took him further than any Superstar I can think of, however. Being outspoken is cool, but appearing to be irrational or delusional, isn’t. When Warrior and Sting were the “Blade Runners” in the old UWF, we though we had found our own L.O.D. It didn’t quite work out that way.

From: The Madman

I appreciate Jerry and of you commentating on RAW. What does Jerry do when he is off the show and is he still married to KAT?

PTA meetings. Bake sales. Crossing guard duty. Only kidding, Madman. The King has a lovely, young, early 20-something girlfriend who is in college in Memphis . He still wrestles frequently and closely follows the Cleveland Indians and the Cleveland Browns. His marriage to Kat is long over.

From: Michael

Hello J.R, how are you? I was wondering if you could answer me one question, do you think Bill Goldberg will ever come back to the WWE?

Well, Michael, the old “never say never” cliché fits well here. I assume if all the stars lined up properly and enough cash were involved that it could happen. But I seriously doubt it, and that’s too bad for a variety of reasons.

From: Chris

Hi Jim, I was wondering on the current status of the Big Red Monster. Is he coming back anytime soon? Cheers, Chris

Chris, I expect to see Kane very soon on RAW. Check out the Kane novel. It’s called “Journey Into Darkness.” I personally thought it was well-written and imaginative.

From: Charles

I am happy with WWE’s attempts to get tag teams going. The team of Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch has caught my eye. I rub my eyes watching Trevor in the Ring – a mirror image of the Dirty One. Val Venis-Viscera is a neat idea as well. And my favorite of all is William Regal and Paul Burchill. I hope this team keeps things going, Burchill reminds me of another wrestler from Stampede Wrestling. He has that Benoit, Dynamite Kid, Johnny Smith look to him a real ring grinder. There is a chance one of these teams could take the world by storm like the NEW AGE OUTLAWS did.

Not sure why I am saying this, but I am getting a huge kick out of Rob Conway! That theme song is the best ever. I look forward to it every week.

You sound like a longtime fan and student of the game, Charles. The tag team area is ripe for the pickings and it is anyone’s guess as to which duo is going to step up, innovate and improve this aspect of RAW and SmackDown. There is big money to be made if a team can go on TV and get hot. I hope the young teams are preparing and watching tape of the Midnight Express, Rock ‘N Roll Express, Brisco Brothers and the Horsemen, to name a few. There is a reason all those teams were great.

From: Joey Fiscella

Hi Mr. Ross…I am and always will be a huge Ultimate Warrior fan. I have watched wrestling since I was 4 and I’m wondering if you think we’ll ever see him in a WWE ring again?

Not very likely. Warrior, and that is his legal name, does not appear to be a big fan of this organization. His frequent rants seem to indicate much. His charisma and “look” took him further than any Superstar I can think of, however. Being outspoken is cool, but appearing to be irrational or delusional, isn’t. When Warrior and Sting were the “Blade Runners” in the old UWF, we though we had found our own L.O.D. It didn’t quite work out that way.

From: The Madman

I appreciate Jerry and of you commentating on RAW. What does Jerry do when he is off the show and is he still married to KAT?

PTA meetings. Bake sales. Crossing guard duty. Only kidding, Madman. The King has a lovely, young, early 20-something girlfriend who is in college in Memphis. He still wrestles frequently and closely follows the Cleveland Indians and the Cleveland Browns. His marriage to Kat is long over.

From: Michael

Hello J.R, how are you? I was wondering if you could answer me one question, do you think Bill Goldberg will ever come back to the WWE?

Well, Michael, the old “never say never” cliché fits well here. I assume if all the stars lined up properly and enough cash were involved that it could happen. But I seriously doubt it, and that’s too bad for a variety of reasons.

From: Chris

Hi Jim, I was wondering on the current status of the Big Red Monster. Is he coming back anytime soon? Cheers, Chris

Chris, I expect to see Kane very soon on RAW. Check out the Kane novel. It’s called “Journey Into Darkness.” I personally thought it was well-written and imaginative.

From: Charles

I am happy with WWE’s attempts to get tag teams going. The team of Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch has caught my eye. I rub my eyes watching Trevor in the Ring – a mirror image of the Dirty One. Val Venis-Viscera is a neat idea as well. And my favorite of all is William Regal and Paul Burchill. I hope this team keeps things going, Burchill reminds me of another wrestler from Stampede Wrestling. He has that Benoit, Dynamite Kid, Johnny Smith look to him a real ring grinder. There is a chance one of these teams could take the world by storm like the NEW AGE OUTLAWS did.

Not sure why I am saying this, but I am getting a huge kick out of Rob Conway! That theme song is the best ever. I look forward to it every week.

You sound like a longtime fan and student of the game, Charles. The tag team area is ripe for the pickings and it is anyone’s guess as to which duo is going to step up, innovate and improve this aspect of RAW and SmackDown. There is big money to be made if a team can go on TV and get hot. I hope the young teams are preparing and watching tape of the Midnight Express, Rock ‘N Roll Express, Brisco Brothers and the Horsemen, to name a few. There is a reason all those teams were great.

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