Start of the Show:
WWE Raw kicks off with a bang as J.R and the King welcome us to the last Raw before the Vengeance pay per view! Tonight, Angle will go one on one with the world champion, Batista! The draft lottery also continues. Also tonight will be the marriage of Lita and Edge.
The Champ is HERE..
John Cena’s music hits and the WWE champion makes his way to the ring! Highlights are shown from last week’s incident with Chris Jericho after their tag team victory over Tyson Tomko and Christian. Cena gets on the mic and says he ain’t gonna lie, he’s only been here for a minute but he’s starting to figure out how things work. He says one minute he’s teaming with somebody and the next minute his partner is kicking his ass. Cena gets the crowd in Phoenix pumped with some wild west talk before focusing on Jericho. He said Jericho wants the biggest prize in sports entertainment, but there is just one problem, Jericho has seen nothing yet! Cena says Jericho wants to make it personal, so if he’s going to do it, he might as well do it right. Cena calls Jericho out and then says he hasn’t forgotten about Christian either. He says forget Vengeance, they are gonna do it real big right now! You want some, come get SOME! Cena stands in the ring waiting and the music of Muhammed Hassan hits.
The music stops and the crowd chants “USA.” Hassan says he is not surprised because Cena is here bitching like the rest of the people here, bitching with NOTHING to complain about. He says Cena was welcomed to Raw with open arms. But him? He was welcomed with nothing but predjudice and hatred. Each week it has gotten worse! He says he was screwed last week by Steve Austin. Cena cuts him off and tells him to give it up, it’s old. Cena says he don’t care if you’re white, black, yellow, red, it don’t matter. He says these people don’t hate him because he’s Arab American, it’s because he’s Asshole-American. Cena says he came out here for a fight and if it won’t be Christian or Chris Jericho, how about Cena fights… YOU. Eric Bischoff comes to the ramp and says he knows Cena never had a real general manager, just Teddy Long, a glorified baby sitter. He says this is HIS show. He then books a world title match for tonight against Muhammed Hassan. Cena says that is supposed to be punishment? He fought to get the title and he will fight to keep it! Cena tries to pick the fight right then and there. Hassan says he needs to get ready. Daivari gets on the mic and says a bunch of junk. Cena tosses him out of the ring. Cena tries to fight Hassan again but Hassan backs out and goes to the back as Cena’s music hits and he stands tall in the ring. They will meet tonight for the WWE Title!
The NEXT draft Lottery Pick!
Bischoff is in the ring after the commercial break. He says it is time for the next pick and they nailed it on the head again! Before he brings out the next pick, he is going to bring out the star of last year’s draft, the IC champion, Shelton Benjamin! Benjamin comes to the ring with his title as Bischoff gives him congrats on holding on to the title since October 19th of last year. He is one of the longest reigning champions in 10 years! He then talks about Taboo Tuesday. Bishoff talks about a sense of irony and whatnot how Jericho did not know his opponent. Shelton grabs the mic and says he sees where this is heading. Bischoff is going to make him face the next Raw draft pick, right? Bischoff kinda shakes his head, and Benjamin says they don’t need to sit through it. Bring him out! The music of Carlito Carribean Cool hits! He makes his way to the ring and we will have an IC title match right now!
Mid Match notes:
When we come back from commercial break, Carlito has Shelton in a headlock. Shelton fights out but Carlito works him over and sends him down with a clothesline. Carlito covers early for a two count. Carlito mounts Shelton and pounds away on his head. J.R KEEPS calling him Carribean Cool Carlito over and over again. Carlito has a front face lock on shelton, the crowd gets into it a bit and Shelton works his way out and he goes off the ropes several times, missing blows, finally the two connect with a double clothesline sending both of them down. There is a 10 count by Patton but both men are up at 8. Shelton blocks punches and fights back, he hits a back elbow, clothesline, and high back body drop. Shelton climbs the top but Carlito meets him and chops away. Carlito climbs up but Benjamin knocks him off with a headbutt. Shelton nails him with a top rope clothesline but only gets a two count. He goes for the T-Bone but Carlito blocks. Carlito backs Shelton into a corner but Shelton hits a northern lights suplex for a two count. Carlito goes a little low on Shelton and nails a big DDT, he covers but only gets a two count!
Benjamin nails a samoan drop and almost gets a three count but cannot.
Carlito uses a roll through on a small package. He grabs the ropes and.. 1….2….3. We have a new Intercontinental Champion!
Winner and NEW Intercontinental Champion, Carlito Carribean Cool
Referee: Chad Patton
Viscera’s music hits and he heads to the ring in a robe. Simon Dean is already in the ring with a mic talking smack on the big man calling him “huge” Heffner. He keeps going but…
Viscera slaps Simon and then tosses him around. He misses a splash and Simon kicks him in the knee. He then works on him with shots to the head several times. Simon mouths off to Lilian but Viscera slaps him and then nails him with a rolling heel kick. Viscera shakes his stuf and then splashes right on top of Simon before giving him the sodomy move. Viscera picks him up and drops him with the Viscera driver. He holds for the cover and gets the pin!
Lilian announces him the winner and comes to the ring. She says they have been moving pretty fast, but this Sunday at Vengeance they will be in Las Vegas and she is hoping things can go a little faster… she says at Vengeance he will get lucky and hit the jackpot! She then plants a kiss on him!
Is Jericho “back into it?”
Jericho is with Todd in the back who asks him if his interest in wrestling has increased since he has a world title shot now. Jericho says of course it has. He says Cena’s album is flying off the charts because he is the champion, well after he becomes the champion this Sunday, Fozzy’s album sales will soar! Jericho then talks about how he had to attack Cena to take things into his own hands because he has not had a one on one title shot in 3 years. Christian shows up and says that Cena might not even be the champion at Vengeance and Jericho is over looking Hassan as well as himself. Christian says the last time Jericho over looked him he lost at WrestleMania 20. Christian says while Jericho dreams on the road about Fozzy going platinum, he will be going gold at Vengeance. He then says both Cena and Jericho’s CDs suck!
Bischoff is shown in the back watching a TV after a Hell in a Cell promo is shown. Angle shows up and talks about how Batista’s week starts tonight. He then says he will make HBK tap again at Vengeance and he will do it for a general manager who respects him. Kurt sucks up and says unlike Cena, he wants to shake Eric’s hand. The two shake and hug and act like little boys together.
Lita and Edge, The Marriage:
The ring is decked out as Edge’s music hits and he comes to the ring in a black suit with a cowboy hat and things. The bride music hits and Lita comes to the ring noly wearing anything! Her dress is short and her knockers are flying everywhere! She grabs Edge by the hand and they stand before the priest. The crowd boos the crap out of them as the priest tries to speak. He says something about them sharing a story of their love. Edge and Lita look on smiling as highlights are shown. Most of it is of them making out and Kane looking on and crying and whatnot. They start making out as the priest coughs to get their attention. He says they want to now express their love in a spoken word. He then also says there is a large and unusual man who also wants to come here and say something. The crowd cheers, they think it’s Kane! It’s Gene Snitsky! He stops at a podium with some silly suit on. He says he wrote a special passage for them called “It’s not my fault.” Snitsky gives off a poem poking fun at Kane and throwing in silly love lines. He ends it with a bay reference saying “It’s not my fault, you had a dead bay in your uterus.” He poked fun at Kane and erections and so on. He then leaves and they proceed with the vows. Edge places the ring on her finger and Edge says everyone knows him as money in the bank, but she now knows him as money in the sack. The crowd chants “BORING” REALLY loud as Edge finishes his vows. Something about not marrying a 7 foot tall freak. Lita’s turn comes up and the crowd chants “SLUT” at her! Lita says a bunch of stuff and says she has never been in love with any man. She says she does not care what these people say, but if falling in love with him makes her a slut, then she is proud to be the slut of the century! The priest does the whole “if there is anybody here who feels….” Speak now or forever hold your peace…..
MATT HARDY’S MUSIC HITS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But they got us again. It was all a joke by Edge and Lita! Edge says he could not resist and says he will explain it to the priest later on at the reception. The priest tries to go on but he stops and says “JESUS CHRIST!” Kane comes through the ring! He gives Edge a big boot and slaps the choke on Lita but Edge clubs him and throws the priest at him. Edge runs off with Lita and Kane destroys the entire stage as Edge and Lita look on in huge fear. He picks the priest up and brushes him off. He looks at the top of the ramp at Edge and Lita. He then changes his mind on the priest and gives him a tombstone right in the middle of the ring! Kane’s pyro hits and he stands in the middle of the ring laughing!
In the back, Coach tries to get a word with Kane but Kane chokes him and grabs the mic. He looks into the camera and says he is sorry for ruining their special night but.. “heeeeeeeeee’s baaaaaaack.”
Christy and Victoria..
Todd shows highlights of Christy getting attacked by Victoria and then getting disqualified a couple of weeks later when fighting Victoria. This Sunday they will face at Vengeance. Christy says every time she thinks about that bitch she gets so mad, it makes her blood boil, she wants to rip her head off. Christy gets fired up with Todd but then out of nowhere she is cracked with glass in the back of the head. Victoria stands over her and says she guess she is a bitch. Todd is yelling at Victoria and he checks on Christy and finds blood on the back of her head. He yells for someone to call 911 as she is not moving and outcold.
WWE Championship Title Match Title Match
The two men circle the ring before locking up. Cena leapfrogs Hassan and drops him with a shoulder block before clotheslining him over the top rope. Cena heads outside and knocks over Hassan and Daivari. Cena throws Hassan in the ring but Daivari holds his foot and Hassan picks up the offense with stomps on Cena followed by a takedown and mounted right hands to Cena’s face. Hassan hits a vertical suplex and covers for a two count. Cena fights back with right hands and headbutts before nailing a few clotheslines and a hiptoss takedown. He drops Hassan and does the “you can’t see me” Daivari gets on the apron but Cena knocks him off. Cena drops the knuckle on Hassan and then pumps up the boots. He nails Hassan with the FU and covers him for the victory!
Winner and STILL WWE Champion; John Cena
On the way up the ramp, Cena gets jumped by Chris Jericho. Cena fights back but Christian shows up and the two men fight over stomping on Cena. They meet face to face and Christian backs off. Jericho kicks Cena in the ribs and picks up his WWE title. He stares into it as WWE head to a commercial break. ‘
Christian is shown leaving the arena, he stops to talk to some ladies saying they are looking at the next WWE champion. WWE then go on some Diva search crap. They cut Cena and Hassan short for it probably. They show the 8 finalists, we will meet them next week, so no need to tell you them now. J.R and The King come back and tell us that Carlito will face Shelton this Sunday at Vengeance.
Non Title Match
Mid Match Notes/The Finish:
Angle puts Batista in a painkiller but Batista gets up and gives Angle a sidewalk slam. He then tosses Angle outside the ring and slams his head off the steel steps. He goes to throw him back into the ring but he is attacked by HHH and Ric Flair. They throw him in the ring, the bell is called for. All three men beat on the champion but Shawn Michaels makes the save! He goes crazy and tosses Angle right over the top rope with a full front flip! Batista gathers his feet and knocks HHH out of the ring with a clothesline!
Winner by DQ: Batista
Bischoff comes to the ramp and says this is not how it is going to end tonight. There will be a tag team match right now! HHH and Angle vs. Batista and HBK!
Tag Team Match
When we come back from commercial, HBK is working his way out of a headlock from HHH. He punches away and nails a flying forearm! He nips up and clocks Angle. Angle gets the attention of the referee and Flair comes in and chop blocks HBK. HBK is in trouble now in the corner as Angle and HHH stomp on him. Angle slams HBK with a bodyslam before taunting Batista as HHH and Flair work on HBK in the corner. Angle puts HBK in a leg ring submission before slamming his knee off the mat.
Mid Match Notes:
HHH comes back in and he hammers away on the leg of HBK in the corner. HBK shows heart and fights his way out but HHH gets another kick to his knee. Angle comes back in and he works on the knee of HBK some more before placing him in a SICK STF. Angle is in control but HBK works his way out eventually hitting a back suplex. Angle is able to tag but HHH gets HBK before he can. HHH taunts Batista as he works on the leg of HBK some more. HHH gives HBK a knee breaker and he hooks the feet of HBK but Micheals reverses and tosses him into the turnbuckle! HHH tags, angle grabs the foot of Michaels but Michaels nails an inzeguiri! HBK slowly crawls and he makes it! HHH and Batista go head to head! Batista unloads on HHH before dropping him with an elevated back body drop. angle hits the ring, Batista knocks him down with a hard right before clotheslining both men down to the mat! Batista runs back and forth clotheslining both men. He drops Angle with a powerslam and then drops HHH with a bulldog slam. He covers but Angle breaks it up! HBK and Angle fight into the crowd as HHH nails a knee facebuster in the ring. He comes off the ropes but Batista drops him with a spinebuster!
Ric Flair hits the ring and Batista gives him a spinebuster as well. This gives HHH enough time to get up though and when Batista turns he is kicked in the gut and HHH hooks the pedigree in… and down Batista goes! 1…..2…..3!
Winners: HHH and Kurt Angle
HHH prances around the ring with the world title as the show goes off the air.
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