Itâs the end of World Wrestling Entertainment as we know it – and I feel fine.
After a roaring week of hype during which they got media coverage from WJBF in Augusta, Georgia; Yahoo and WWE.com; the WWE paid off on their offer to give away (pinky tip to lower lip) one million dollars on âRaw.â Could the desperation hail-mary pass from deep in the red zone someway, somehow find its way into the hands of the receiver and score a ratings touchdown?!
Seriously?
First, a little context. Since 1996, here are the ratings for the second âRawâ of every June:
06/10/1996: 2.7
06/09/1997: 2.2
06/08/1998: 4.3
06/14/1999: 6.7
06/12/2000: 6.8
06/11/2001: 4.1
06/10/2002: 4.2
06/09/2003: 3.5
06/14/2004: 3.6
06/13/2005: 4.0
06/12/2006: 4.3
06/11/2007: 3.8
(MAN did they kick our ass in 1999 and 2000……anyway…)
So for the second âRawâ of June 2008?
3.0
The lowest since 1997. What will the excuse be this time? Huge number for the season premier of âMaster of Danceâ on TLC? Hardcore fans torn between âRawâ and the âRoman Polanski: Wanted And Desiredâ documentary on HBO? The âGrace Under Fireâ two-fer on Oxygen?
One thing is for sure: the million dollar give away is a failure. Itâs kind of hip to take an image showing some poor schlub suffering the agony of defeat and placing âEpic Fail!â or some such on the image to capture its height of futility. Perhaps someone will do a screen capture of Vince McMahonâs face when he heard, for the third time, static on the line followed by a busy signal as he attempted to call one of the winners and label that photo âWWFail!â Yeah, yeah, yeah…I can hear the apologists (i.e. the head in the sand brigade) now: You donât know what youâre talking about! Its only one week! Just you wait until the end of June and THEN weâll see if it was a failure!
I hope Iâm wrong. I would like nothing better than to see the WWE once again vault up to a 6.8 rating. (DAMN that still hurts.) The wrestlers and crew would make more money and everyone would be happy. After all, they do have stockholders to answer to. Wait a minute! That may be it!
The WWE is a publically traded company. Maybe, if this trend continues, a group of stockholders will mount some kind of hostile takeover. And maybe the company will be in such a sorry state of financial affairs that no one that owns a share – not grandmama in her suburban Shreveport âinvestment club,â not the Western New Hampshire Railroad and Mercantile Retirement Fund, not anyone – will hang on. And maybe, Vince will sell out and spend a few, honestly, well-earned years at the beach wearing his bermuda shorts and Birkenstocks scouring the dunes with a metal detector. And maybe, just maybe, someone will buy up whatâs left of the WWE and inject some creativity into it so we can enjoy wrestling (you remember that, donât you? Sport of Kings?) again.
Does anyone have Ted Turnerâs cell phone number?