Charge Of The Lite Brigade; The Slop Drop; Pay Up, Suckers

Mark Madden

CHARGE OF THE LITE BRIGADE

It’s easy to see where TNA’s ECW revolution is heading: Tommy Dreamer is going to wind up in charge under the guise of Paul E. Lite, and a whole lot of TNA stalwarts are going to flee to the new Wilpon promotion.

Emboldened by Impact’s latest rating – only a total twit would be encouraged by a tenth-of-a-point gain, but Dixie Carter qualifies – Dreamer will convince Dixie he can do what Heyman would, but without firing anyone and anyway, Tommy booked a lot more of the original ECW than he was given credit for (yeah, right).

Dreamer is pure mid-card, if that, but what an amazing opportunist. Hey, he married Beulah.

It’s insane to think that this salute or that style is anything beyond stop-gap but, like I said, we can all see where this is going. A lot of TNA performers have certainly caught said drift. Many want NOTHING to do with EV2, some vociferously so. You think Hulk Hogan wants his bald spot caved in by a Singapore cane? Wilpon is the next mark, and hasn’t yet had a chance to lose faith in the usual suspects.

But he will. He will.

Parenthetically speaking, Hogan’s current situation is a mess, if rumors are to be believed. He reportedly made a lump-sum divorce settlement to his wife, Linda, who used some of that dough to buy her way out of the car-wreck lawsuit. Said infusion of cash enabled the aggrieved to lawyer up and continue suing Hulk. Stuck with a mansion he can’t sell, Hogan is allegedly in deep, deep financial trouble and, for the first time, that last big match isn’t out there.

Every time I criticized Hogan back when, I was sternly reminded, “That man enabled us all to make a lot of money.” Maybe those same people will pass the hat for Hulk. Or maybe the sun will fall out of the sky. If guys like Bischoff, Heenan and Okerlund learned one thing from Hogan, it was “Every man for himself.”

If you want to see the face of truth, check out Raven when all this ECW gaga permeates TNA TV. He looks like a shoplifter. Those guys are stealing. Scotty knows it, and he can’t hide it.

Hey, where’s Kimona? Her, I would like to see.

The “success” of EV2 on TNA will probably spawn another series of “Hardcore Homecoming” indie shows. Can’t wait. At least TNA will have successfully promoted SOMETHING.

Bruce Mitchell of Pro Wrestling Torch is writing an excellent series on how to fix TNA, and he makes one particular point I’d like to expand upon – the crowd at the Impact Zone wouldn’t like the necessary changes. So what? They’re freeloaders, and they’re holding back TNA. You can’t let one crowd in one arena dictate your big picture.

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